What comes around goes around...
Its been another fruitful year. 2008 is coming to an end..
I did say I created great achievements this year, but do I really?
If there is a chance to turn back time... what would I do?
I am glad I have come this far, but sometimes I think, is it worth it? Am I worth it?
I fought in many battles this year. Most of which came to the stage where I am satisfied with where I stand. Does not mean that I win in all of them, if I have lost, I lost in grace.
I am very proud of my partner's success,achievements... but seems like the words I say does not mean anything anymore. Its annoying how true it is of the saying,if you give in too easily to your man, he will get bored of you. Note the "boredom" isn't necessarily its technical meaning. It means simply that your words have no longer a great impact as it already had.
We have been fighting for 2 days in a row, it's a record. Things have changed. I was told that priorities have changed, I was "first". I am honored but what has happened just before shows nothing like that.
From my previous years of blogging, I realized I never really understand what I want. I thought I did. But I seem to be always changing situations as if I am never happy, as if I dont like this reality. Maybe I dont? I dont know.. I am really confused.
Things are not always what they seem. I want to believe in that, but how sure can i be? Maybe I should go away for a while and think about what I really want in life.
I love him. I sacrificed SO much to be around him, to be with him, to love him. I don't think any of my actions are forced, I still feel my heart beat goes faster every time I am about to meet him, I feel happy when he smiles. He makes my day brighter whenever I see him. Is that love?
The breakup of Issac and Diana makes me wonder if the saying "Fool me once, shame on you; Fool me twice, shame on me" is true.
I believe I am stronger and more confident than I was a year ago. And I am positive that i will be better. Relationships should not be forced, but let flow. Don't know if I am doing the right thing. I want to give him as much support as I can.
But as simple as it is, we all know that it needs two hands to clap.
shAnz
1:50 AM