our story

2008-12-16T01:50:00.002+11:00

What comes around goes around...

Its been another fruitful year. 2008 is coming to an end..
I did say I created great achievements this year, but do I really?

If there is a chance to turn back time... what would I do?

I am glad I have come this far, but sometimes I think, is it worth it? Am I worth it?
I fought in many battles this year. Most of which came to the stage where I am satisfied with where I stand. Does not mean that I win in all of them, if I have lost, I lost in grace.

I am very proud of my partner's success,achievements... but seems like the words I say does not mean anything anymore. Its annoying how true it is of the saying,if you give in too easily to your man, he will get bored of you. Note the "boredom" isn't necessarily its technical meaning. It means simply that your words have no longer a great impact as it already had.

We have been fighting for 2 days in a row, it's a record. Things have changed. I was told that priorities have changed, I was "first". I am honored but what has happened just before shows nothing like that.

From my previous years of blogging, I realized I never really understand what I want. I thought I did. But I seem to be always changing situations as if I am never happy, as if I dont like this reality. Maybe I dont? I dont know.. I am really confused.

Things are not always what they seem. I want to believe in that, but how sure can i be? Maybe I should go away for a while and think about what I really want in life.

I love him. I sacrificed SO much to be around him, to be with him, to love him. I don't think any of my actions are forced, I still feel my heart beat goes faster every time I am about to meet him, I feel happy when he smiles. He makes my day brighter whenever I see him. Is that love?

The breakup of Issac and Diana makes me wonder if the saying "Fool me once, shame on you; Fool me twice, shame on me" is true.

I believe I am stronger and more confident than I was a year ago. And I am positive that i will be better. Relationships should not be forced, but let flow. Don't know if I am doing the right thing. I want to give him as much support as I can.

But as simple as it is, we all know that it needs two hands to clap.

2007-03-08T01:39:00.000+11:00

one of her favourites - love tree
=)

his gonna keep waiting for her to come back,
to protect her.

2007-02-22T03:08:00.000+11:00

BACK AT ONE
By:Brian McKnight

It's undeniable that we should be together.
It's unbelievable how I used to say that I'd fall never.
The basis you need to know,
if you don't know just how I feel,
Then let me show you now that I'm for real,
If all things in time,
time will reveal,
yeah.

Chorus:
One, you're like a dream come true,
Two, just wanna be with you,
Three, girl it's plain to see,
That you're the only one for me and
Four, repeat steps one through three,
Five, make you fall in love with me,
If ever I believe my work is done,
Then I'll start back at one.

So incredible, the way things work themselves out
And all emotional, once you know what it's all about
And undesirable, for us to be apart
Never would of made it very far
Cuz you know you got the keys to my heart cuz.

Repeat Chorus:

Say farewell to the darkened nights,
I see the coming of the sun.
I feel like a little child, whose life has just begun
You came and bring life into the lonely heart of mine.
You threw out the life line
Just in the nick of time.

Repeat chorus:

-message from fu-
=)

2007-02-19T05:01:00.000+11:00

Find the person who will love you because of your differences and not in spite of them and you have found a lover for life.
=)

2007-02-18T15:54:00.000+11:00

-love's in the air-

2007-02-17T23:41:00.000+11:00

"Somewhere over the Rainbow"
David Choi - *awesome*

2007-02-16T00:11:00.000+11:00

For You, I Will.

"Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you, how much i feel about you."

2007-02-14T00:29:00.000+11:00

Happy Valentines' Day!

2007-02-14T00:19:00.000+11:00

If people dont laugh at your goals,
It simply means they are not big enough...

2007-02-11T21:40:00.000+11:00

= lala n me; 2003-2007 =

*thAnks fu*
=)

2007-02-11T02:04:00.000+11:00

Don't stray
Don't ever go away
I should be much to smart for this
You know it gets the better
Of me sometimes
When you and I collide
I fall into an ocean of you
Pull me out in time
Don't let me drown
Let me down
I say its all because of you and here I go
Losing my control
I'm practising your name
So I can say it to your face it doesn't seem right
To look you in the eye
And let all the things you mean to me
Come tumbling out my mouth indeed its time
Tell you why
I say its infinately true
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
And there's no cure
And no way to be sure
Why everythings turned inside out
Instilling so much doubt
It makes me so tired
I feel so uninspired
My head is battling with my heart
My logic has been torn apart
And now
It all turns sour
Come sweeten
Every afternoon
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
Its all because of you
Its all because of you

2007-02-07T23:33:00.000+11:00

Ai Qing - Aaron Kwok

dedication from BB

2007-02-06T21:35:00.000+11:00

I walked in Coles after work + dinner with Lala..
and as I moved down the isle to grab a folder
to improve on my "collateral management" ..

I noticed bunnies at the corner of my eyes..
Its.. Heritage's..

1st reaction; I grabbed the bunny and tilted it upside down
"Best before: 30th September 08"
*awwww*
THAT was made n packaged when I was there!
I set the expiry dates..
I fixed the label printer..
I weighed that bunny..
made sure it was 50g+-
I tested its chocolate temperature, and
seen it moulded and cooled and packaged..
sigh..

I do..miss.. HERITAGE =(

Just almost immediately, I grab one of those neatly foiled
bunnies and paid of it. . .
Its just something I won't forget ever..
Although I left Heritage on my own account,
sometimes I would still reflect and took a sec to think,
"Where would I be at the end of the year if I'm still @ Heritage's QA today?"

I know its stupid but nah.
Its over.
My bad, I always do that.. i look back and i ponder..
=_=''

Well.. good news is,
I have learnt to start to pick myself up again and again
I mean it. .
I admit its very difficult now at the start..
But I am trying my best
no matter what..
I will and I Must reach my Goals.
Couple of things I learnt at work today,
I have to maintain positive attitude
And have Expectations.

Its so interesting how these words vary
"Hope", "Try" and "Expect"

I hope to get H1
I try to get H1
I expect to get H1

See what's the impact? Get what I mean?

=)

Also, ther's been few debates lately
1) Does Destiny = (equals) Happiness?

- Someone didn't. Strongly believed its Commitment = Happiness
- He thinks destiny is crap
- He feels one can fall in love with a 60 year old woman even! - as long as he bothers to commit
- When asked if he can do that, he kept quiet for 10 seconds
- I take it a no

- I dont agree. I believe its a combination.
- If its meant to be its meant to be = fate
- If ur fate is there in front of u, u have to commit to make it work anws

- We debated long enough for me to came up with the logic Dad told me
- There are 2 types of destiny; gd & bad (duh)
- Well its true, 2 persons may be destined together, but that doesnt mean that they WILL be happy. aint it?
- Anws, I rest my case

2) Someone said, you will draw an abnormal reaction if u're ard someone you love;
basically it means you will not be ur normal self. *duh*

- He thinks that with that person, you will be abnormal because you would be talking high and basically everything under the sky.
- You wont think about work, nor money, nor the weather..
- Just blanked out at the top of ur head

-I think that is weird, because if ure ard someone you love,
ure supposed to be perfectly normal.
- You should be at most comfy, most relaxed, will talk about everything yes.. but high? 0.0

haa.. So aniwaes,
its just at the top of my head..
pardon my long winded entry

Women's from Venus and Men's from Mars..
How true. . .

2007-01-30T20:20:00.000+11:00

The shock of reality
not only made my stomach flipped
it sent my spleen right up my throat.
even that tough sprain on my ankle did not hurt as bad
at least not till now..

I thought I had grown so matured by now
at least, sufficient to tackle my own problems
I realized I have not
IN fact, Im not even close
Compared to someone 4 years my senior,
I feel like I am 12.

This long talk that I had
I finally realized my deepest fear
which is having to NOT know what I wanna do
I DO know many things in life
Its scary how u always know what u thought
you knew but in fact you have no idea
what you have had in your mind for all these years

How can I possibly NOT know!?
so here I am struggling to find the answer
everyday, everytime.
Once the right picture comes along
One mere harmless gush of wind blows it off and gone
One day I'm in, another day I'm out.
Its always like that. Always.
Someone slap me.

This final breakthrough of walking into that door
that opens to the real world make me realize how much
effort I had to put in, the past 20 years of
sweat, tears and brain wrecking days
aint all it.

Graduation is not the end afterall,
It is the beginning,
of life.
I mean it!
If you'd think you have led a great life so far
and you think
you can count on it,
think again. .
You cant, not even the richest kid
or the most successful person i know.
well at least, at this crucial stage..

The world of unlimited choice
that's filled with infinite restrictions and sarcasms
The world where u can easily find easy tackled ads
with countless of hidden icebergs
The world where you bothered to go the extra mile to be one real adult
where nobody actually takes you seriously

It is just how important it is to do what they call,
"Incorporating Wise Up for Career world"

Its weird, how you struggle SO MUCH in the University
But after walking down that narrow path
you realize it IS really a narrow NARROW path
no T nor Cross junction whatsoever?
Where and WHEN can I ever find that pedestrian crossing
if there's any?
I know that this narrow path
is taking me down the longest tunnel ever built
I know that I will find a destination
OH I BET I WILL.
Just when will this tunnel end?

When things come too easy
we'll suspect.
do they have to get complicated
before we believe they are for real?
Most of us are raised to believe that
the course of different segments in life
never runs smoothly
there is always an obstacle in Act two
before you live happily ever after in Act three
but what happens if the obstacles aren't there?
does that mean that something is missing?

2007-01-11T03:41:00.000+11:00

Loving the right person at the wrong time,
Having the wrong person when the time is right,

And finding out you love someone right
after That person walks out of your life.

And sometimes,
you think you're already over a person,
Until you see them smile at you again,
You'll suddenly realize that you're really not.

For some,
they think that letting go is one way
Of expressing how much you love the person,
By sacrificing your happiness for theirs,
Without realizing that the other person's
Doing the same thing for them.

Most relationships tend to fail
Not because of the absence of love;
Love is always present,
It's just that one is being loved too much
And the other was being loved too little.

I heard that if you give up things too easily to a man,
he will get bored with you
i don't think this is wrong
a girl says that she will never be fooled again
but she will fall in love again

-= I will still miss you because I am a girl, to whom love is everything =-

//Kiss, because I'm a girl//

HAPPY 21st BIrTHDAY KIM! =)
hauhauhuahua

2007-01-08T02:43:00.000+11:00

Your Birthdate: November 20

You are a virtual roller coaster of emotions, and most people enjoy the ride.
Your mood tends to set the tone of the room, and when you're happy, this is a good thing.
When you get in a dark mood, watch out - it's very hard to get you out of it.
It's sometimes hard for you to cheer up, and your gloom can be contagious.

Your strength: Your warm heart

Your weakness: Trouble controlling your emotions

Your power color: Black

Your power symbol: Musical note

Your power month: February

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

2007-01-07T14:58:00.000+11:00

My Girl OST

- Thumbs UP! -
Another great series!
Good story, Good actors n actresses;
Good song, good beat.
Hilarious yet roooomantic.

Made me laugh and cry...
^x^

Girls ! .. and guys mayb.. ?! Check this out~
hAhahs
http://www.hancinema.net/korean_Lee_Joon-ki.php

2007-01-07T06:04:00.000+11:00

Waiting.. ?

so... we do have our own paths..
Its no longer my worries anymore

so being stubborn and dumb as I am,
here am i sitting up waiting..

haa finally the sun rises and the birds started chirping..
hmm..
i guess its time to
.... sleep.. =)
time to ..
tell myself there is more to do, that
there is always a better tomorrow..

I will get there.

2007-01-03T00:58:00.000+11:00

One of the most memorable trips I've had. . .

1) Cherry Farm

Angel seemed like she was in her dreamworld =)
she could not stop smiling
giggling.. and jumping around..
look at all her poses.. lol my lil girl..

we all raced (ok not all.. mayb mom angel and bro..)
as to who picked the most cheeries @ the end of the day. .

2) Maze garden; with loadsa big fat flies

3) Some beach close to frankston; with more flies

4) Night market, at vic mart. . .

*awww i love this pic best*
my dad was helping my sis salvage her painting..
she wet the brush too much before she paints
so her unicorn was dripping with "blood" then.. =_='''

@ one look, the pic looked photoshop-editted. bcos of the background.
but its not. hehe
its just one of my lousy camera snaps.
im so lousy at that.
right Ly? >.<

--> ?? uh ya a camel.. owh no there were two.
n they were HUGE.
n smelly.. mayb..?

2007-01-02T14:44:00.000+11:00

Happy New Year ~~ ! ! !

Everything went really smoothly for me . . . .
Finally had whole family reunion dinner - w/o sis tho
Finally had massage session
Finally had proper dinner in Sg..

Had one of the front row seats on plane..
The weird girl who sat one seat away WHO talked to her video game
left me with another guy
so i had the whole ROW for myself.

I did had the chance to stretch out my legs but
because im short it doesnt really matter cos i didnt even cover up two seats.
it was comfy but i felt uncomfy deep inside

Didnt sleep throughout the flight..
well..
almost did. but this air stewardess woke me up to ask if i wanna eat.
i shaked my head
she nodded and then sticked some note on top of my seat
which i realized later on
it says something like
: "SHh! do not disturb passenger"
.......... lol tts cute.

but i already got woken up,
couldnt sleep after.
so i stayed awake throughout,
browsing Kris magz, and
clicking on that remote for like thousand times
for nice movies..
BUT there's none!
ok ther was,
departed, guardian, monster houz, step up..
n i watched them all before
that was it.!
the rest . . . its either i havent heard before
or .. ok . no OR. they all are bad.

OH can u imagine! THEY dont even have FRIENDS on commedy channel!
AND they printed on the magz
New Year - 80 MOVIES showing. - crap.
ITS NEW YEAR!
1st JAN 2007! No nice movies!? No nice song clips too! and no commedies!

haha..
ok.. pardon me.. i sound ridiculous.
IM practically venting my frustration on the silly mini tv..
=_=
so pathetic.
well thats because, that was my only hope to cheer me up
on my way back here to melbourne.

and its ruined. ok not really.
i watched StepUp all over again though.
Watched it on my way back to sg last xmas..
i love their dance steps.. =p

well ok soon after, at about 5-6am Mel time
when i looked outa the window
i noticed blue - yellowish streaks on the horizon
never seen such beautiful sun rise before..
ive seen the sky turned pink-orangy-purplish during sunset
but never have i noticed
such a perfect contrast..
i wish i could take a picture right then..
all i remember was.. it was pitch dark,
with distant bluish smear followed by bright green and
golden yellow. . . maybe a tinge of baby pink along with that
pretty.

and no, i wasnt dreaming.
haha..

so things went really good afterall..
yet im not happy..
in fact
i feel sad
full of regrets, regrets for many things i didnt do
during my 10 days holiday. . .
loneliness filled me as the cooling brezzy melbourne air greeted me..

whilst in the taxi..
movin through all the familiar tolls and freeways..
the conventional hook turns..
the almost perfect city apartments..
it made me wonder
how come it seemed i just left this place yesterday

this all happen so soon..
i havent met most of my friends like i promised to
i havent baked any cakes!
i havent met Mr Soon - oh no..
i forgot to collect my BONDS >.<
i havent told anyone what i really want to say
oh i havent done so many things . . .

Ive been on the plane for 4 times on and off within 10 days
Been to the airport 9 times this month.
Can I go on another trip?
=(

2006-12-14T00:38:00.000+11:00

I am tired and sad enough already.

I am never good enough, right?

2006-12-10T14:52:00.000+11:00

At last I get a family reunion in a LOOONNG time,
though... its in Melbourne.

Papa doesnt need to go to work
Nor tennis
Nor temple sessions with his buddies
He surfed internet webbies with me together
And gave pep talks especially at this period when i needed the most

Mama doesnt need to go to work
In FACT,
She irons, does laundries and dishes, cooks, changed bedsheets
Prepares breakfast and tidies the house.
SHe even mentioned to want to vacuum the carpets =_=''

OMG IM IN HeAVEN!

Hahah…
May not symbolize anything to many, but to me, its something
I have not experienced in a long time.

Really happy, very.

This morning, I woke up with a heavy head,
Alarm clock says 1020am.
6 hours of sleep.. nt bad.. hahA...
I suppose that compensates for the hard long day i had
the day before then.

but soon after distracted by Angel's heavy breathings
and "ai ni tai duo" from one side of the earphone. oops.
yah i fell asleep yesterday with my ipod runnin.. heheh..
ok not exactly worth mentioning,
though i was tired,
Very tired,
I couldn't go to sleep..
so needed some distractions because I had too many things
going on up in my head last night. . . .

****
Angel's such an irresistible cute babe.
last night whilst packing my stuff
advance preparation for movin out @ the end of the year,
i told my mom im so stressed out we got so much stuff in da houz

Angel bluntly replied,
"I got something for you if you are stressed,"
Then she suddenly sang one of her many childrens' songs...
*shakes head*
believe it or not, my stress indeed was gone that instant.

When she finally woke up, minutes later,
She mumbled sth like she wanted to pee.. so
I accompanied her to the toilet,

her butt is so small i was afraid she will fall in to the bowl
when she turned ard
to grab tissue paper.. lol..

then we brushed teeth together! >.<>

superrrr cute. cant stop smilin =p

****
It's time to wake up because time waits for no one.

****

Angel came in to my room n wanted to chat
So since there is no one she knows on my msn list,
I told her to type anything she wanted here in my blog..

i love you cici shanti

i love you mum , dad , you , andri and putri

cici shanti i miss you very much

i love you missssssss you

i want's call you in my HEART

i love you

2006-12-06T03:22:00.000+11:00

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down on your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home,
And ignite your bones,
And I will try to fix you,

High up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home,
And ignite your bones,
And I will try

to fix you.

[Coldplay, Fix You]

2006-11-29T02:16:00.000+11:00

Last week was practically the busiest week I've had ever. It was nothing compared to the whole month of exam period/swot vac really. Well.. I must say its as bad as assignment weeks though. Though to think of it. I sorta have forgotten how exactly it felt like, given by the fact I'm too overwhelmed by the constant realization that I AM Graduated! well.. technically I. . . am =p
Sorry guys, just too thrilled.
hahahahahhahahaha...

hehehe so.. just to sum up perhaps?

20th November

Few minutes to midnight, I clearly remembered I felt nothin.
Nothing like. special or of much.
Neither happy nor excited.. =/
Maybe because I cannot accept the fact I have an exam
that very afternoon..
taking up half of what's meant to be my special day.. =(
and that.. well.. there's some other issues..
well anyway,
Whilst I was in the midst of muggin
(well not exactly - more of like dazzling away)
the phone started vibrating. . . hehehehe
and SO there goes my last teeny weeny bit of
concentration span...

Really appreciate all the wishes and bday greetings though =D
from all of my family and friends..
It was really my honor and fortune to have people like you guys...

Especially my siblings..
u know.. there's nothing as magnanimous as family love in this world! ! !
This year was exceptionally heart melting for me;
'cos besides representing Aug with the surprise cake
they also came with a prezzie - - iPod movie
one that was least expected. >.<

Honestly speaking, I didnt need a new ipod. My ipod mini was good.
Just that technology being technology, battery ran out. so.. yea..
Sure I felt it was wasted, but
happy, surprised and touched at the same time...
It wasn't much coz of the present.
More of the thoughts. . .
I just appreciate the thought that they got me this because
the ol mini might be spoilt though we never really mention it out loud.
sigh

It was hell waste of money of course!
I still couldn't believe it.
Im not an electronic person so its
pretty much something to brood about..
afterall.. its their own money. =(
I was so touched I was lost for words. . .
even till today, all I could say was umpteen thanks..

Most importantly, they put in a lot of effort into planning this surprise. I thought dah would be the main actor, but I have mentally prepared that he would not be able to do so eversince months ago, so I was prepared that The day was probably gonna be like the other normal days. So the fact that they threw me one;

was the reason for my tears of joy.

***
Fortunately, the exam went pretty well!
It was unbelievably the Smoothest exam I have ever sat!
*crosses fingers*
It was probably due to the weather
and the MOOD of course +D =D XD
I received warm hugs and handshakes before the exam . .
Owh owh and more friends n juniors were tapping my table
wishing me hp'bday as they moved silently along the endless isles of the seats in the mansion-like-REB. . .
hehehehe
i felt special suddenly =P LOL

Anyway, thanks to these lil encouragements
I managed to pull through the final 2 hour exam
and i think i was smiling WIDE
as i handed the papers in to the invigilators.
*YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY*

Similarly, Tin Tin who was sitting right behind me
Being her, who's as high as always,
screamed suddenly at the top of her voice
-- of happiness of course.
Hahahaha OKay so she did that out loud.

The rest of the day was mere window shopping for gowns
and accessories for the ball.
Followed by dinner with my family and... thats it.
I was happy anyway, because I know the party is not till Saturday,
so it was all cool. At least I have lots of stuff to look forward to.
=)

special thanks to my friends back in Spore + L.A *-^ for all the birthday greetings.. Thanks Lieyang, Lifen, Shangfu, Joanna, Christopher, Marcus, Gary, Andriany, Khoimun, Jasmin, C sindy, Isnaya, Tsunting, Andy, Terence, Angela, Brandon, Adeline, Jilian.. =) Also, thanks Tsun, Toigoon, Lieyang and Joanna for your birthday cards and gifts all the way from Singapore + Perth ^-* .. its really sweet of you guys...

Tsunting: U are unbelievable... I almost cried. I love you too =p

Toigoon: I was surprised u remembered how I spent my 17 vividly.. I remembered everything u said except for Stuart Little 2 just the 4 of us. I MISS those days.. =)

This came in the morning
Thank you.... it made me smile =)

....I turned 21.

21st November

The day started off with a meeting with my PR agent
to process my application.
Almost forgotten about that,
because that was appointment i made a month ago;
of course oblivious that I had so many occasions
then in the week.
Anyway, it was pretty fast,.. i think..
Then there were more window shoppings at
bridge road - except that I didnt buy any.
I fell in love with this dress i saw in Review,
and although the motive was to find better dress,
it only made me realize how much I really like
the one i set my eyes on before..

so then the next thing to do was meet up with dah dah
and we headed to Myers - they have SALES!
except that.. there was none on Review section.
*grrrrr*
I bought the Review dress anyway.

It was almost 9 and dah was starving so we left
and went to the Old Raffles Place for dinner !
GAWD it was the closest we have in Melbourne
to what Spore food's really like . . .
I must say its pretty good; the menu was hilarious;
they have Eunos's famous fried bee hoon,
Penang belachan mee goreng and Geylang's beef hor fun
or something like that..

i wonder if thats for real. lol..

22nd November

Morning - Had to do medical check up at 10am
It was .... horrendous.
Shameful. Embarassing. And. Humiliating.

During a medical check up,
any of you happen to know that u have to remove your clothes
and cover urself up in a blanket before the doctor examines u,
prior to any instructions?

Please tell me no, because I dont.

He merely told me to get ready,
get behind the curtains and get on the couch.
Without further questions,
here goes naive me,
sitting up the bed with clothes and jeans on;
only to be told later to remove everything, yes everything.

So here goes stupid me, removing everything,
although still in MAXIMUM doubts of why i should
but lied on the bed anyway as told.

When i went out of the clinic, i asked susan,
if she had to do the same, she said yes,
but with fULL instructions and WITH blankets.
gosh. i wish i could dig a hole and disappear.

STUPID DOCTOR!

***
Anyway, the day went on with shopping for Janice's prezzie. -
Got her Swarovski's handphone

pendant
- it was GORGEOUS.
I think this is the best gift I think we have bought ever for someone;
because I know Janice (or anyone) will definitely love it.
and also cos....(I'm mesmerized by it? Hahahahah)
well I might buy one myself one day.. hehehe..

***
It's Janice's Mexican Birthday Party!
That day was great. We had mexican/ bbq food..
it was one great party! =D
Michelle rented this mexican skirt and the whole night
it was all about photo takings with her special skirt.
She was the Girl of the dAY!
(..oops apart from the bday girl of course)
heheheh

Happy 21st Birthday Janice! !

*taken whilst taking a break hehehe*

Lala n me... *Love ya*

23rd November

I did Kungfu exercise with lala in the early afternoon =p
after shopping for last minute necessities >.<>

My hairstyling was done by sis,

Whilst make up was by Christine.. =)

It was great fun~
Everyone looked different...
Turned from geeks into.. gorgeous ladies (..me aside.. ='/)
well and.. handsome.. geeks still? HAHA
Apart from the lil stupid argument i had with dah..
I got to dance! n.. took millions of pictures..
Of course, heels went ReALLy sore.. and..
I was all dead beat..

Nonetheless, excellent ball!
Cheers to Justine and Janice for all their ceaseless efforts to make this happen!
=D

oh im so gonna miss u guys..

24th November

Morning. again, another appointment
with the PR agent.
I shouldnt have agreed to have that tt then man.
It was just not the right time.
But did it anyway.

Oh yea. and Because i woke up late,
I rushed out and forgot to grab my wallet.
had to bother Susan to alight from the train
to get me a daily ticket for the day.

After the meeting, I was starving but was cash-less.
had to wait for sister to my tummy's rescue..
it was crazy, i cant even afford to get a $2 sushi roll. . lol
I thought forgetting to bring my handphone was the worst,
but this is equally torturing.

Only stopping for 20 minutes to grab
few bites of sandwich i bought from Target,
we met up with lala and shopped for
bday party necessities;
more specifically sushi ingredients
Then we went to party supplies
to get more of other stuffs.

dah joined us not long after
and became the Muthu of the day.
Carried our many many bags of stuff.
He then bought Vic Mart's famous Hot Dog
with Cheese and Onion and Fell in love with it.
=_=

I tried on this dress that I was interested in
and realized that the smallest size they have
was too big for my waist;
then the witty salesperson handed me another one -
hawaiian style with rubber-like material on waistline
and it fits just right. except that...
the boobs part was too loose.

SO, after she commented some low level sarcasm
she left with another dress, and... i tried on..oops..
this time the boobs area was too small

ehhehehe

so she got one size larger and tada~ ~
cool~ if fits just right. Hahaha..

After i changed into my own clothes and
approached the counter, lala n sis was already there and
the cashier told me it was paid for.
Lala was smiling from ear to ear as she said,
"Its for you."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i was sooo touched! !

geez. it was quite expensive and i
didnt want her to spend that for me..
i felt guilty and wrong.. i dont know..

sigh..
again, i was dumbfounded. thanks la dear.. .

Later on she left and the three of us
went to Safeway and laguna to get the drinks n stuff..
By the time we got home it was pretty late..
but i went on with my sushi trials straight away
and made lil onigiri(s)...

William dropped by to pass me my prezzies -
2 boxes of Krispy Kremes. gosh.. so kind of him..
shudn't have at all.. he's like another sweet guy i know..
wonder why sis isn't u know..

mmm.. finished everything right about 230am..
and went to bed at 330 after bathin n all..
***

I had a deep sleep.

25th November

Woke up at 930am and continued to make more sushis..
Followed by buying more stuff from coles for dessert..

Preparation starts at about 5pm..
I was lucky I had lotsa helpful helpers..
Sister, August, Stanley, Susan,
Tika, Gina, Stephanie, Gareth, Stella and Rizky
SPECIAL THANKS TO YOU guys.
LOVE YA!

Without them, I dont know how I would have cope up anymore.
I was basically tired out by then... ='/

Thanks... guys...

And of course,
thanks for everyone who turned up that day for my party.

Without you guys, my 21st wouldn't be as memorable.

The .... surprise @ the end was amazing!
I get to blow no candles on my bday cake;
but 21 candles held by each person individually.. =P
it was very special indeed.

Thanks Put dear for the idea.. and to everyone..
Thanks for bearing with me and the hot waxes =p

Finally. =)

I hope we'll all stay in touch. *Hugs n Kisses*

2006-11-18T19:14:00.000+11:00

My heartfelt condolences to Rove . . .

I've never seen him frown . . . =(

2006-11-16T04:15:00.000+11:00

Know how you try and avoid certain things in life;
Tried to avoid it, fight it and deny it;
Yet you always get back to square one?

Yes that's what happens most of the time
where there's always an end to such dilemma;
So there is this one day;
where you have to face the music there and then.

But there are also times
where u stubbornly pick up negligence instead of realism
yet creating this cycle continually;
Although you knew that deep down
you are just getting yourself into accumulated mess?
because there is no way ure gonna evolute from that in any ways u can think of;
even though you very much want to do it your own way,
Although u are also aware of how much uncertainty there is in grabbing on such hopes

but humans are only humans...

2006-11-16T02:39:00.000+11:00

It snowed today

Practically the coldest day in a while..
no, its been the coldest everysince winter.

Too bad it happened only in Dandenong/ Lilydale - outer suburbs of Melbourne. haa..
In the city its just raining-ice
I'd love to see how it snows.. =/

***
Time passes so quickly!
Cant believe I have finished two of my papers. . .

It was disappointing for the first though..
In another words,
wasn't good.

Very disappointed and all.
Horrible..
No wonder I had this weird-uneasy-nervous breakdown
the day before. . =/
I thought it wasnt because of that
since I was all prepared..
yet.. it
was just a pathetic omen.

2nd exam was much MUCH better. =D
I felt so happy because I made one lucky CORRECT guess this unexpected qn

Except that. .
I stupidly made an unintentional mistake --
skipped one subquestion (8 marks) =_=''''''
which accounts for abt 5% ! !

=_=''''' I know. . .

****

Anyway, went to do finger-printing at the Police Headquarters today
Susan claimed that this stern-looking cop who served us at the counter
was rude; cold and snappy.

I thought so too at first
But it wasnt long when I found that
whoever he was - police admin staff or sergeant
(since he signed under that on my form)
is sooooo cool and . .
cakeeeppppp ! ! >.<
especially when he smiled at me before he left =)
heuheuhueuehueuhe

When we were all done
we realized it was raining pretty heavily outside
and i was without hoods nor umbrellas...
And we have our precious documents at hand;
the last thing was to get them wet.

so . . . .
since we cant leave..

we hang around this lobby area
though part of the reason was for . . .

(NOT the policeman)

but..

these CUTE chairs/seats ! ! !

*they have plenty of these little precious there*

*AWW*

*lucuuu*

*hmmm enak ya sann?* hahaha

****

Wanted to check out on my brother earlier in the night;
to see if he was muggin hard for his last paper on Friday
AND i found him watching this movie -- Four Brothers =_=

... wanted to scold...
but. . .

The prologue was sooo interesting !
hAHA and I ended up joining him instead

Seriously. Highly recommended; GOOD MOVIE! !
its a 2005 movie though. . .
Hahaha..

http://www.fourbrothersmovie.com

*boohoohoooo*

yea. I better tie myself down in the library from tomorrow onwards.

I'm h a p p y
=)
finally

2006-11-12T04:07:00.000+11:00

Feeling sick ='(
nausea.. headache.. weak.. cold...
yep.. exams syndrome..
- my kind

Counting.. n waiting..
I hope miracles happen.

.
.
.
.
.

didn't.
. . . . . .

sobs

t.t.f.n...

2006-11-10T13:44:00.000+11:00

My aunt popped on msn earlier in the night,
to chat ask about how things have been goin with school, exams and of course,
with Mom and Dad. .

No surprise; just a couple of same ol' advice and complains
she always attempted to put across to my Mom
through me. =p

Appreciated it anyways because I love to hear
how's things have been goin on back home
when Im not around ----
although mostly what I derived from the conversations
most of the time were plain disconsolation
- unsolved or unknown problems.. quarrels.. the list goes on..

Last night was different though.

First, she mentioned sth about "Notaris (indo)" which I didn't understand =_='' and had to first ask around for its definition (OK and laughed at by my Indo friends) before I caught up finally with what she was blabbering about..

AND realized... ooo.. OKay..
so she was talking about how promising my Dad's current degree is.... ;
That her friend who is a Notaris earns alot per client and
so has managed to link my Dad's potential to that;
after he completes his degree mid next year.

yup... NO kidding

my Dad IS studying
just like all of us right now
Masters Degree in Law
yea i know.. I cant believe it either...
BUT
I have a COOL dad! haa~

According to him, he ACEs his exams!
...............
*-*

CONGRATS TO MY DAD~! =)

HAhaha.. owh well.. i think i have a serious problem with profound Indo terms!
=_='''

OH n Funny how she also shared another jolly story ! ~

-= MY SIS, ANGEL, IS a smart n cunning lil' kido ! ! ! =-

ANGEL also plays MSN! (Gosh kids these days? - She's 5 btw. )
haha.. but she uses one finger.
ACcording to my aunt, she takes ages to choose the alphabet to type in

So this aunt, together with her sister, (my other aunt) was teasing Angel
on how slooooowww she was
whilst she was busy searching for the alphabets in admiration;
-- basically playing with somewhat her new "toy"...

That obviously that annoyed her
so she turned around, and
suggested a game with the two cheeky Aunts . . . .

-- the almighty scissors-papers-stone --

oh yea.. what a smartie dont u think?
the winner - gets the computer
(Awww~ ~ ~ )

1st round, none wins.
they had scissor, paper and stone respectively

So Angel suggested that
both my Aunts shoot "Stones" whilst she shoot "Scissors"
so there will at least be a winner
(.. I dont know why she suggested that...
...just some.. inexplicable kids talk .=P)

But my Aunt admitted to me that she felt weird too..
because that WAS a stupid suggestion obviously =_='''
but they didnt correct her. . .

So 2nd round,
BOTH my silly Aunts actually shot "STONES"

Guess what.

My SMARTIE sis shot "PAPER" !

She smiled & then quietly rushed back to "her" computer seat.

(HAHAHAH)

MY PRECIOUS - Angel...

2006-11-08T04:02:00.000+11:00

These 2 days.. not productive at all! - i meant studying of course.

SIgh..

Apparently I do have endless worries.. had to book for my 21st bday venue soon. Wont have time to do any plannings anytime next week aniways. so here goes my list....

First it was deciding my birthday.dinner.party venue - Amello St Kilda Seabath restaurant. want something different and memorable, since this is my 21st~ and might be our last dinner.bday.treats (me being the youngest in the group =_=) and some form of celebration to all potential graduants - and.. a farewell to some whom might forgood this year.. really hate that fact.

Second deciding the date - considering who ends exams when, who's leaving melbourne when and finally arrived at the tentatively ideal date - 22nd november. SADLy yes, nothing is happening on the day itself. how exciting.

Third deciding the guests -who knows who? who must come along if i ask whom along? who did i miss out? should i even invite whom in the first place? should i hold 2 different days of dinner instead so the group is not to scattered? stress. Stared at the many many names i typed up fer what seemed like half a day - and decided - ok, cant make a solid decision. just sent to all potential guests and their bf/gfs and asked to RVSP.

Ok.. its supposed to be something to look forward to.
21st.
bleah.
planning it sux.
& its starting to get on my nerves.

Right after i clicked on the "send" icon, i thought i could finally go back to my studying peacefully and little do i realize i have actually tons of other matters haunting me, especially during this less than 7 days worth of PRECIOUS mugging days...

It was - the fact that I cannot get a ticket back to sg/indo in December. Diana says all flights in December are overbooked by 200 ppl! omg. So here i have to be proactive in making frequent calls to SQ; hopeful they will confirm the tickets one day.

Then.. there's dah's future stay issues..
- Should he stay for my graduation, look for house together, move his tix from 29/11 to 11/01, find an ideal housemate? - very complicated; its all his problems, but inadvertently has been quite dependant to a large extent on my family's decision.. (And myself) which led to..

my brother's unknown barrier issues.. with dah..
I was taken aback, hearing his responses
but he's afterall like me, we have one thing or maybe two in common;
'stubborn' and 'limited trust'
Feel really sad because its coming from him..

maybe he is thinking for the future.
maybe..
he plainly plans to hold eternal grudges with dah..

sigh. STRESS!

THERE's ... MORE!

- PR application.
- Honours Application vs Work

If i choose to work & not honours I cant go back for holidays, because that dangers my PR application processes.. whICH means im wasting my time thinking all the above.

BUT the thought of full time Honours - dreadful. i feel so NOT graduating!
but again, its for the best. for future.

* SIGH *

AND.. loads more.. cant think...

* TIRED *

2006-11-07T15:55:00.000+11:00

Aww dont you just miss those days? ! ! =D

2006-11-03T03:49:00.000+11:00

Officially rejected from Kraft Strathmerton. =/

It was.. very pleasing rejection call of course
but i feel shitty anyways =P

wELL.. there u go for putting too high hopes...
the higher u climb the further and harder u fall huh..
at least something I've ReALLY learnt today. . .
though told umpteen times before =P

On a positive note, the harder u fall, the more it hurts
the more it hurts the stronger u'd become
and thus the higher u'd climb
the higher you climb you'll then find yourself
eventually getting out of the hole.

Guess patience is a virtue...

***
Thanks to you peeps.. who have consoled me in one way or another =}
Or at least have listened to my moans... ={

For something I've done today that can i thought was quite an achievement... - dyed my sister's hair and covered quite a fair bit of work, which i totally understood - casomorphins + all those opioid peptides. In human words, its just milk proteins + stuff that accounts for its benefits. LOL.

TML- IS FRIDAY. goodness! ! ! how time flies...

another long day to go .. police station.. withdraw cash for BALL tickets (yippe).. uni at 10am.. collect OUR abandoned report (=_=''''').. and.. complete "Finger Print Impression" for police checks =_='' loadsa tasks before I can settle down again...

***

= 0932 313 ^0^ =

So here's one nice song *wohooo* BUT being 'updated' shu shu may not know what this is all about haha let me help with the reminscing~

2006-11-02T02:57:00.000+11:00

Its N O V E M B E R~!

n o v e m b e r ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

weeheee aint it a nice word? such a nice name for a month.. wahahaha...
OK i know where im going nowhere..
guess im on the verge of getting some
chronic-emotional-stress-thlamia-tension or sth..
hahahaha

so tired these days~ tho i dont think i studied much =_='' geez.
what have i done?
mayb i'll have to drain a cup of coffee or two each day =/

***

Had a haircut this afternoon ~ yeay~ finally! It was.. this bold HK haircut according to Ko Teddy, cutting straight off my scalp persenting thin shades of layer. . . cool. so my hair feels so light nw ahhaha.. was careful to let him know i want it to be feasible for any hair syling; fer Food Science Ball at the end of the mth ~~

AnywaYs yea its not too short. dah dont u wanna meet me??? u wanna c me u better come meet me tml u pig.! hmpfff !

***

When I opened my mail today and picked up a letter addressed frm "Kraft", i thought, Ok, that is it. Again. Rejection Letter. ='(
Just as I thought my hopes were all strapped off, it actually read, " Thanks for your application for the position of Product Quality Assistant at Kraft Foods PORT MELBOURNE," heyYyYYYYYYYYY thats not Strathmerton! ahhaha.. yippeeee~

a.k.a NOT the 3-hour-away-Kraft Factory i have dreaded a response from for the past 2 weeks.
a.k.a. the one less than 1 hour away from City
a.k.a. ANOTHER Kraft factory which I applied to about 1 month ago - which i totally forgot; until i read this letter
a.k.a. Something to look forward to; at least an experience .... oh well who am i kidding - A POTENTIAL JOB next year of course =P

hahahaha...

oh well.. though i was already too thrilled to notice it wasnt a rejection letter but something.. hopeful...there was one issue though,

It says "We are currently collating and reviewing applications, we will be in contact shortly to inform you the progress," =_=''

*eeeekkk*

OK

aniway, im content =} geez.. see what N O V E M B E R does? ahhahahah
told you, nOVEMber is great~ lol.. what a great month to enjoy. Especially during the 20th hauhauhahua and the 11th =P

OK

-= Sleeping time =-

*yawn*

Oh god this cat seriously portrays what Im feeling right now. totally.

2006-10-25T00:34:00.000+10:00

-the unbreakable bond that lies between the sistas-

2006-10-22T04:13:00.000+10:00

"A moment on the lips forever on the hips", says Amy in a FRIENDS episode; where she innocently commented on Joey's obsession on food -- generally. Lol. It made lotsa sense. hahaha >.<

It's an extremely witty movie as compared to that of Orange County (The O.C), which I have inadvertently fallen addicted to. Like them both. =D Been a good girl ^0^, haven't touched that in .. 3 days already =P ; have given full attention to what seemed like countless assignments ive got .. but I guess im in control. =p

Seriously fer the past one week... Busy busy busy. Loadsa work to do, both in experiment and computer labs. Heheh finally had it 1/3 covered and done with. However I do have 4 more assignments to do until Monday -- week after. ={

To tell the truth Im really excited about Monday's presentation. I think its gonna be great. I planned a surprise for my colleagues.. I hope they'll love it =D

Lotsa things happened, apart from doing assignments; had a bbq, met snoopy n roxy, played 007, had girls chit chat fer 4 hours, cried 1L of tears, had few days of boredom and loss, watched 'The Departed' with the gang, got real disappointed, walked from home to Uni for the first time this Semester (yeay!), lectured my best friend, shopped with sis, had a debate, got a new com, had a few good laughs, dug a key from rubbish bin, freaked out by an ugly black huge hairy spider =_='' and... played snake & ladder drinkin game… -- a snap preview of the week's load of stuff that I did. Haha~

Just a little thought here..

I know things aren't always what they seem. You put your hopes too high, you suffer. If you don't, 50% chance is you don't succeed. Confidence is vital. Time and time again I look back and think, it's time to turn over a new leaf. Indecisiveness is not even worth considering - anymore. You make a decision. It's your life. Choice, not chance, determines your destiny. You have only one chance (eminem ^0^) it's true, but like what happened in the debate yesterday; everyone has a freedom of choice, you decide whether you accept GM food or not; you decide.

Don't have to eat it if you don't want to. So do what you want do.

''Be a man, do the right thing,'' (Peter Russel) =D

Ok no. Be happy; make the right choice. =P

...thought of it? Everyday.

2006-10-06T05:04:00.000+10:00

my tears - unstoppable

2006-10-03T23:11:00.000+10:00

*hmm* HOLIDAY IS OVERRRRR

*hiqs*

i WanT mY HOliDAYS BACKK~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

its only the 2nd day of sch now and gosh - so worn out. been rushin my assignments and presentations (blamey for doin this last minute) hey 2 weeks isnt that short ! time flies so quickly.. hai.. right now i have 2 assignments down. 5 more assignments before the final exams, which is the 13th, 14th and 20th Nov! ! Ta - DA - Ta - Da.. *drums rooolllll* shan's all DONE WITH! ! ! yippee ! ! !

which reminds me...

*reminiscing what actually happened approximately 4 years ago* exactly on the 20th nov 2002.. the day i sat for my last paper- A Maths; the day I finally step out of CCHS(MAIN) as an officially GRADUATED 'O' Level graduate student; & also, the day i turned 17. (In Indonesia, there is such celebration known as sweet seventeen for all girls; where they get to dress up n hold dinner dance parties in hoTels etc.) haiz. yep, i missed it. Bet no other indo girls have missed this. Its like 2nd to parties to your wedding day or sth. haa.. well anyway, not all my friends can spend the rest of the pathetic day with me as well.. cs apparently A math paper was tough n some was kinda broodin over it.. =/ to make things worse like it cant be any further, my ex bf wasnt there either to celebrate with me...

luckily for me, I must say, there was this 3 beloved friends who stayed by me the whole time.. *thank you*; n we encountered the most embarassing thing ever -- Toni Romas's incident, rmb? he he he he =p well soon after the 7-guys gang frm my class came ^0^ n celebrated e rest of the day with us in Suntec city.. @.... some garden area.. it was rily rily cooL.. i wonder if ther's any pictures.. EH yeS YeS we did took some!! now i wonder where they're with.. =_='' he he he anyway, i was really happy. Those i mentioned earlier never came across my mind at all.. too occupied to think so.. AND it was close to purfect day fer me =D oh right.. I had this 2Kg cake from Kimseng who wasnt able to attend the cake cuttin session =_=' that was one of my bday presents he generously gave me that very day..

BAck to 2006. now, im picturing a deja vu.. though its not quite. haa

c.. on the day im turning 21, i'll be technically graduated from Melbourne University. *GRIN* my BF definitely cant spend the day with me.. he's got exams on the 20th n 21st. =_='' n these 2 he said was the hardest subjects out of the 4 he had.. so yah.. well i Definitely cant spend this with most of my friends cos most of them probably havent ended their exams yet.. though my dinner party would be held on the 22nd/23rd Nov, its still.. different.
guess i will be all alone that night then =_='' *sigh*

Anyway, gotten this contagious sore throat fer the last 2 days, probably either frm my friends over up-late 'gatherings' the past holiday.. O R c0s of my sudden crave for the ol' gd pri sch lovers snack -- mamee the few days before that. *oops*

well it was Sunday when i realized it got pretty bad bcos i found blood in my phlegm whilst brushing teeth that morning. gross yea. but it was frikkin thornin my throat out or sth.. =/ forced myself to drink - what seemd like 5L of h20.. sis tooK care of me surpRISINgly.. by cooking soupy stuff n and healthy drinks too... well by Monday, i threw up more blood in the morning but by the night the sore kinda ceased.. i must say im almost recovering right now - throat wise, but somehow caught flu.. =_=''

Oh stupid me.. i woke uP late for lecture this morning @ 9am n i woke at 842am =_='' reason being, my stupid alarm clock didnt ring at 730! ! god.. luckily lectures are meant to be missed *kidding* Errrhhh.. yeah.. i managed to get to uni before 10, ie. for my presentation. ha ha.. well it turned out to be gd ~! i must say im quite satisfied with everyone's effort todai =P dont know how the markings go but *crosses fingers* we should be fine~

OK

whilst cooKing dinner.. my mobile alarm clock rang..
it says - 730pm, Wake uP! Wake uP!

*gRRRRrrrr*

=_=''

2006-09-30T17:18:00.000+10:00

Sowelu - no limit

h0pity h|p|ty h0p song ~~
haHa..
In the midst of my bored0m n relieving stress whilst doin my assignment in my br0's rooM.. i found these really nice songs.. haa but the nicest would be ...

-- THE ROSE by SOWELU --

2006-09-25T02:47:00.000+10:00

ima horrible person.

no one understands me..
at least I thought you would..

I blame myself.
I really am sorry.

2006-09-22T18:54:00.000+10:00

O dear...

Yesterday, Stanley frets about his decision about his postgrad studies too. Masters vs. Honours. Everyone's telling him to apply for everything; Including job applications too. Well… *poor him* I thought. . . . . had headache bcos of this...

Little do I realize I am actually in the same boat.

Few days ago, I was oblivious to the dilemma I'd face after I graduate -- or even, before that. I know I will be; sooner or later.

Today I realized, "that", has to be settled even sooner than I thought.

Gosh. All along I wasn't that worried because I had a plan --- to get a job after I graduate, then apply for Masters in Applied Commerce (Marketing). Here in the commerce postgraduate booklet says, "designed to enable young professionals to develop, implement and control integrated marketing programs, work closely with managers in other functional areas" OK. So Food Science and Marketing -- fair enough? Or so.. I thought.

I've just applied Bachelor of Food Science (Honours) in RMIT this afternoon. (right nw, apply everythin' aint it?) I've also been offered Honours program in Bachelor of Food Science (Hons) in Melbourne University; but have yet applied. However, approximately after few months of observation of these Honours seniors on what they do etc., I kinda lost interest. Lots of thoughts are going through my mind right now; not everyone can enter Honours program I know... but its all based on interest isn't it so? With Honours degree, I may be able to get Phd. Which by the way dah, its known as Doctor of Philosopy =p

So when I came home, I thought, I might as well do a couple of researches for this.
The situation turned from bad to worse.
NOW I have a more choices in mind;

1) WORK
2) Master of Applied Commerce (Marketing) - Mel Uni
3) Master of Applied Commerce (Operational Management) - Mel Uni
4) Bachelor of Food Science (Honours) - Mel Uni
5) Bachelor of Science (Food Science) Honours) - RMIT
6) Master of Biotechnology (Food Microbiology) - RMIT
7) Master of Biotechnology (Clinical Microbiology) - RMIT
8) Forgood – Work in SG

Haa.. what should I do?

2006-09-16T19:51:00.000+10:00

-=- speechless =-=

2006-09-16T17:38:00.000+10:00

awwww.. such a nice Japanese drama.. highly recommended!
there's only 11 episodes too. .
look look i found the lyrics heheheh..

=-=- Aya-chan & Asou-kun =-=-

kanashimi no mukou kishi ni
kohoemi ga aru to iu yo
tadori tsuku sono saki ni wa
mani ga bokura wo matteru

nigeru tame ja naku
yume oi tame ni
tabi ni deta hazu sa
tooi natsu no ano hi

ashita sae mieta nara
tame iki mo nai kedo
nagare ni sakarau fune no you ni
ima wa mae he susume

TRANSLATION

On the other shore of sadness,
it is said that there is a smile.
Finally we arrived,
but what are we waiting for?

The purpose is not to run away,
it's to chase dreams.
We should have gone to travel,
on that summer day so long ago.

Even tomorrow, if you see it,
though there isnt a sigh either.
Like a ship going against the current flow,
right now, go forward, move ahead.

Even if it cuts through the rain and clouds,
the wet roads shine.
Only the dark will teach,
a stronger and stronger light.

Be strong, go forward, move ahead.

2006-09-15T01:17:00.000+10:00

Its been a while since I got this gush of exhilaration of starting the day.

In fact, the tingling of excitement sorta started right after i finished 2 of my major assignments @ approximately 230am todai.

the feeling is so good.. its like.. ooooohhhhhhh..... FINALLY. huahuahuahhuaua... unnn but i woke up late thou. had a class @ 11. but i woke up @ 11.15am. who cares. haa.. assignment over ! hmm... in spite of that, i still had to rush for the nx class @ 12. But, i promised dah dah i will prepare lunch fer him that day. =_='' was wondering if i should cos he was mean to be the nite b4. *hmpf* but.. i promised. so i went to kitchen straight to make this sumptuous toasted wholemeal sandwich with bacon, honey leg ham and scrambelled egg on Famous-Naked-Baby-Print mayonaise. (Heehee). by the time i was done, it was half past 11. gosh. grab some undies, and ran n bathe, rushed tru everitink and managed to catch the tram @ 1154. =_='' OK. Definitely late. but... again, who cares? Assignment OVER! .... at least fer this half of the semester.. hohoho...

anw. apart from that, i was authorized to attend the annual Fine Food & Hotel Australia; held in this massive exhibition area. went there after that only 1 hr lecture i had today which, by the way, i attended for only half hour. =p

That exhibition was so cool! its meant for business purposes actually. fer wholesalers and on-going manufacturers to promote their stuff fer bulk sales or sth like that. BUT.. there were lotsa free samples as well! OF COURSE, thats what all my fellow Food Science peeps and myself are there for. HOHOHO. lets list them.. although all are bite-sized... but .. omygosh..

pastries, sausages, pies, korean pancake, chocolate dips, ice cream, green tea, cookies, rice crackers, corn chips, biscuits... =_=''

but.. who cares? I was having fun! moving from isle to isle... tasting all types of food.. of which some aren't even sure gonna be on the market yet! what an honor. hohoho. sis was complainin why i didnt ask her to go. .. guess i was dumb. yeaH man. i should have told her to register early in the month! @ first i thought this is meant fer just Food-related industries/ peeps.. so i didnt tell her about this registration. but t0dai there wasnt even any inspections on who's allowed to enter or whatsoever. so mayb nx year. I'll be back. We'll be back. .
haa

owh i also managed to grab this suPa cOOl deal with this Indonesian kitchen supplier fer this cutey cow print set of "kitchenwares" for just $10, for sth that is worth $30 or so. Then he gave me an extra small pan and blue metal lunch box container fer free ! what a luck ha.

After this amazing trip to the Exhibition, Susan, Chiu Yan and me had a great one hour plus of girls talk.. never had such relaxin time fer so long.. hangin out with my friends and all.. thanks to such a wonderful assignment-free day! unnn.. right after that i rushed back hOme to meet up wit my cousins who just came last Sunday. we had a good reunion of course, with all those updates and jokes and rubbish we talk whole night... not forgetting the simple yet purfect delicious plate of souvlaki @ this greek restaurant..

I also had a good tiMe shoppin groceries or should i say junks @ laguna followin dinner.. and guess lady luck's wit me.. dont know why but suddenly everythin's so cheap! bought like 2 full bags fer only 20 odd bucks. =_='' when i reached home, i realized i had an e card greeting =D i love mails! its so sweet too..

look, what a great simple day. what more can i ask for? =D
*wonder when my letter's comin tho.. * tick tock tick tock.. its been 2 weeks hellooo?? ^0* time flies.. ha...

hmm.. that reminds me. i have an IELTS test this SAturday.. havent really started studyin this. well..ppl say its easy, cos its General (PR), so nth to worry about. but i guess i still hve to memorize my resume or sth. just in case they'll interview me on my attributes and project/team work experiences. =P (heehee)

ummm... tHAt also reminds me, after Saturday, my 2 weeks holiday starts. and right after that, i'm left with 5 more weeks of school. after which i will sit for 3 final examinations, and then, announced as a Bachelor graduate student.

time flies...

was browsing my past archieves and realized.. so many things have changed... mostly my happiness.. not that i grew less of it.. its jst not the same sort of happiness i used to have.. but im glad for what I have this very moment, with all my new close friends and sister and cousins.. and new activities around me.

also.. it is so hard to forget.. i still cant forget... 11 mnths ever since.. and its still goin on in me..

The saying goes... "A retentive memory is a good thing,
but the ability to forget is the true token of greatness,"

OH I AM a forgetful person, many people can second to that. Thing is.. I tend to forget the wrong memories... ='(

A memorable song..

-==-=-=-=- S0m30n3 wh0 l1v3s 1n y0ur h34rt =-=-=-=-=

2006-09-12T03:49:00.000+10:00

Listen.

Do you realize that most of the time, you dont listen to your heart?

Why not?

ego? unknown or "known" fear? stubborness? temptations? curiosity or perhaps . . . . tinge of stupidity?

do you end up in regrets? yea.. but u know thats inevitable dont you? =\

tell me, there is no such thing as its too late, no?
Having said that, you follow your heart.

But tell me,
what if...
the cycle repeats itself again. . . . . ?

=_=''

2006-09-09T03:06:00.000+10:00

hEYYYYY! ! ! ! !

h3r3 goes... my 1st vide0clip entry! hehe *thanks to fu* =D

erm erm erm..

@ this moment this song has been on my mind fer a few days.. thanks to my sis suddenly bringin this up whilst makin a movie fer her media project.. *lol* anyway.. As my fave pastime (as usual =_='') i watched "I'm Sorry I Love You" last summer hols... its one of great korean dramas, other than Full House. trust me =D

OH OH OH ! part of it was casted in Melbourne, cool ha. he he he he...

Also, just wanna share with you peeps.. what i thought is the best American Comedy show ever - FRIENDS; here take a look @ the bloopers...

Hopefully these can entice you (fer those who havent start watchin yet) to start hogging ur dvd players to watch it right away! h0h0h0

Fell in lurve with it - think i watched it twice nw from season 1 - 10, n never fail to laugh OUT loud at the same jokes.. *-^ yep its 10 years of filmin.. n certainly lifetime of memories and laughters... =D

Enjoy!

Blooper Part 1/2

Blooper Part 2/2

2006-09-02T18:15:00.000+10:00

Why do we have nightmares?

Why do I get it 2 nights in a row? sobsob..

funny thing is, dah called and woke both me n sis up... was complainin to him abt my nitemares n all.. practically blaming him for what he did in the dream.. which i think was so mean of me because he definitely wasnt at any fault. its just sth i made up. well.. it could be premonition though, could it possibly be?

Anyway, when i've finished, sis was complainin i was so noisy and the phone call disturbed her dream --> whICH was, having this sumptous meal of ma po to fu and roast duck in indo =_='' omg. when can i dream these kinda dreams?

i realized there are reasons behind these. do notice the little things/ symbols.. it could make really lotsa sense. f0r instance,

"falling" --> Loss of honor. Fear of failure. Loss of power and feeling out of control.

"food" -->Pleasure or greed. Nourishment. Fortune in love affairs. <-------- which is so true fer my sis... *no wonder lha* ha ha ha ha

"fear" --> Unexpressed love. Self-doubts. Courage. *hmmm*

"shock" --> Unexpected blow. Great surprise and agitation. Need for awareness.and awakening.

"smiling" --> Pleasure. Affection. Joy. Looking for something that makes you happy

"snow" --> Purity. Clarity. You want a fresh start.

As dreams can feel very real a nightmare's can be full of terror and fears that can be very real and sometimes repetitive. For some this kind of dream brings a real terror which can seem inescapable.

If you or somebody you know are having nightmares, then using Lavender oil sprinkled on the pillow or a couple of drops on the forehead (Lavender can be used undiluted) or a piece of Amethyst crystal by the bedside are just a couple of things that can be done to bring back sweet dreams.

worth a try =}

2006-08-28T00:45:00.000+10:00

Back from Buller ! ! !

this trip's e 3rd year in a row... yet its still great as ever. In fact, its the best so far.

First and foremost, I managed to sleep in the bus.! (hAha - hey.. its critical~) Well at least unlike previous years, i stayed awake and was bored by the 3 hour bus rides.. Secondly, after we got our equipments, we still had 1 hour ride up the mountain to do the Real THING! erh... well i rmb exactly that time last year i had bad nausea cos of the 1 hour roundabout ride up the Mt.. n vomitted up there.. it was a total turn off really. well this time, although i felt stupid i didnt bring the travel sickness pills, i managed to avoid vomittin by forcing myself to sleep! he he by the time i woke up.. ta da! im there! gee i do sleep alot. i think i didnt get enuf sleep like i said, so i was feelin super piggy that day. oh well.. who cares..

Secondly, Im so happy I didn't fall at all for the first 3 hours skiing! Think I managed to overcome a certain extent of my fear of heights.. i took the ski lift 3 times in total - as compared to 0 times last year! ha ha.. and ski -ed ! cant believe i ACtually did ! he he he

Thirdly, my brother enjoyed it.. =D his msn nick's --> new discovered talent *bleah* ha ha ha ha.. he's really good though.. its his first yet he's great at it.. Dah's snowboarding skills improved greatly too =D so does stanley's and fred's haha.. didnt catch the rest but i think everyone's especially enjoyed this time round.. surprisingly dah didnt leave me alone this year.. he accompanied me throughout, i really appreciate that.. ^0^ ...although @ first i was kinda upset he took snowboarding; instead of skiing when he promised to... but in the end we played together.. so its gd.. =) gee n i did 3 times up the lift for u! i seriously had the heart attack the first time... ='(

it was really enjoyable.. when i skiied.. it was unexplicable. felt soooo good. urh.. it was breezy.. fast.. i felt free.. almost like flyin.. hnn.. =_='' Did attempt few turnin patterns.. though wasnt that smooth.. ha ha! hmm the snow was kinda thick too.. thanks to the snow fall the day b4.. was kinda expecting it to be pretty much gone due to the weird warm weather recently in Melbourne.. (as alwaiz.. duh)

Anyway, loved the time when four of us (me dah stan and fred) took the lift together. =D that time i was in the middle so its good ha ha.. i hate to sit at the side when i felt like i could just slip off the handle and fall or sth. We didnt manage to get to the top of the mountain though! arg! kev n rose did. they said they almost reached the clouds. took some pictures ( it was beautiful) and then took the lift down again.. didnt dare to snowboard down cos it was too steep.. haa.. geez.. i was told that idea 10 minutes to the end of our snow trip. cih.. was too late! ! ! hnmm... this is what i'll do. After my photoshop course i will do something about their pics and modify it to mine. hauhauhuahuaa... *evil thoughts* stupid kev wanted to sell me those pics for ... hundred bucks ?

Although sis wasnt really getting it until the last 2 hours.. she told me she likes it =D got the hang of it @ the end of the whole thing.. Guess i have to thank William too though.. For takin care of her. He was the most patient guy I've ever seen.. so good to my sis.. Coachin her n everythin. . *smells sth fishy* ha ha ha ha n they both denied they like each other =_=''

on the way back.. I managed to sleep again on the way back home.. he he heh.. it all goes according to how i wanted.. lolz..betcha.. i had fun.. loads.. =D

this morning when i woke up though, my calves hurt.. think i used too much muscles down ther..and due to those bad falls.. so painful it hurts so bad.. so are my shoulders cos i think i slept too much =_='' + i sprained a lil of my left wrist.. yeh.. that reminds me -- it was one of my worst falls cos i almost banged this lil girl.. tried to avoid her.. but.. yah.. it was a bad fall. close to split or so. i was stuck @ this weird position for 5 minutes.. cih.. think that's the cause why im in pain now..

fu says eat banana.. duno how that links but... Banana costs $12/kg these days.. =\ any other fruits? haha

Just a verse from Kiss - bcos im a girl..

I heard that if you give up things too easily to a man,
he will get bored with you
i don't think this is wrong
a girl says that she will never be fooled again
but she will fall in love again

-= I will still miss you because I am a girl, to whom love is everything =-

2006-08-25T23:46:00.000+10:00

found this interesting stuff in a Health Shop, its called Bach Flowers Remedies. Anyone?

Check this out:

http://www.bachcentre.com/centre/remedies.htm

Originated in London, its used as an emergency kit to aid the traumatized victims in any accidents. It works pretty simple, just 2 drops on the tongue and thats it.

well Vargo's gonna do some research for me, he says.. so if it workss...... n with no side effects... i might get one... maybe i do need more than one... lol..

its been some time since i last spent quality time together with the indoes.. Chris n Eugene.. haa.. how great ha.. i can c how happy chris is.. really glad for both of them.. so is Kev n Rose.. hmm.. ppl change so swiftly.. duno why.. these days i have been unintentionally exposed to various romantic and loving couples. so envious.. but.. i dont know im too confused, have too much mixed feelings right now.. oh i so need a remedy.

Had dinner@ Thai Taste, meant to try out for nx week's aug's bday dinner.. they had such delicious delicacies, like soft shell "crap" and bbq chix.. yummm.. ha ha ha ha.. not forgetting ther's gonna b Pork Shank.! woo.. haa.. yea.. ths has been sometime i had one of those rare proper meals with him.. he's always been busy.. =(

Anyway, had to go Mt Buller tml @ 4am. Had to wake up by 3am, 3 hours from now n im not even asleep. Yesterday had only 2 hours sleep cos i cant get to bed and had to do a bit of thinkings.. bu.. indeed Made ME thINk. well.. instead i resolved it by writing a complain letter to this building management regard to some infrastructure etc.. *yawn*better get to bed.. this is the third time im blogging tonight, thanks to me not gg "Cntrl + C" darn! it died on me jst like that. ! hmpfff...

Fu.... I DID IT! ha ha.. well not in a grandmother story today ha.

LY: ive fINIShed your letter! ! ! However i didnt manage to post it todai cos it was all cold and rainy todaiiii sob.. n i was too lazi to get out of the cosy room n suddenly it was after 5... *oops* so sorrrieeeeee... doNT SColD me yaaa so sorriii! ! ! ! =p owh on a good note, u'll be pleased to read many of my interesting stories.. HAHa! rmB, u owe me double ! ! !

Tsunting: come to melbourneeee ! ! ! =D

Dah: i need a remedy. any. haa

2006-08-17T03:07:00.000+10:00

feelin so lost todai.. haha..

1. Intended to do some work @ uni after the ONLY class i have todai.. --> forgot to bring the red file. everything i could possibly work with is in there. so yea. well i remember chucking it last night in my drawer. why did i do that ha?

2. The photocopied, unbinded thick stack of textbook for this subject/ assignment will be of help, i thought. so i brought it aniway, get it binded. it was so heavy! (hmpf) anw whilst this guy was binding it, i thought i had no cash. so i asked if i could use EFTPOS. yEs, but $10 min spent. well since it costs $4.50, so i had to insert $10 to this specialized card of theirs. hesitated, cos i dont n wont go to this photocopy shop @ all in near future, since its not quite accessible. but had no choice. did it aniway, but realized i had cash after the transaction. =_=''

3. After i left the shop, n was 5 minutes away from my lecture, i realized i had few copies of notes that i had to photocopy. BUT i forgot to do it then. *manz*

4. Went to this only lecture and realized we were still @ lecture 3, didnt quite finish it last lecture. n I had lecture 4 with me. in fact, 2 copies of lecture 4, one for stella, and amazingly the lecture 2. hell. y did i go to school today? haa

hilarious. well my girls tell me i do that all the time. so it wasnt new to them. they just shake their heads and smile. hmff..

went home aniways, thought i might as well do it @ home.. had 3 different assingments to do this week.. work n work n work.. sobs.. n mY brain's kinda fully-loaded, with only what seem like 1mB left..

had to re-edit-edit this proposal, over n over again. so confusing. haa.. hell is that most scientist life out there? man.. to dvelop own methods n procedures.. n basically research reserach n research.. so b o r i n g. . . .

then the other one.. due tuesday.. haa n my com wasnt cooperating with me. stupid com. it cant open certain websites. n it had to be those important websites i had to view! =_=''' i guess i had to do it in uni over the next few days.

halfway through my assingment, had to let my sis take over for her assignment, so i went to read my notes, WHilst lying on my bed.. which is something any student with an assignment due should not do, because yes. i fell asleep. Huahuahuaha... *oops*

well i woke up aniwae, cos i had this strange sad dream.. dreamt of my mom n dad.. I MISS THEM! ! ! !! yah, i really miss them.. in that dream, they were all here.. n working.. the structure of the apt is exactly the same, except that the door was @ the window.. but to think again, it was bigger than this, so i guess it was more of a house.. well aniwae.. it was indeed a cosy house.

i remembered chatting n playin with my mom on the bed, when my dad came home from work.. it was so real! well then to my despair he says he had to go again. sigh it was late.. but he had to go still because of company concerns. why is it so similar.. even back in reality he always do that to mom.. then i snapped n tell him he shudnt, n tell him various reason of how he should have been there with mom n not alwais leave her alone..regardless its for work/ tennis/ sch.. of course i brought up if i was treated the same way by aug i would be really upset. well my mom n dad have this issue so perhaps i may seem exaggerating, perhaps only some will know what im going through..

then in that strange dream, my dad understood me, n gave me the childish frown look, n says ok, i understand.. --> HUH??? how could that be? well he went to Andrie's room anw, then as we sat by the bedside, he sobbed. ---> HUHH? then i vividly remembered hugging him close.. how sad..
--> owh we did woke my brother up, n he had this funniest expression with his nostrils somehow enlarged, mouthing --> WHY? haa

well somehow dad n mom was talking out there telling her he still has to go. the dream sort of ended there.

woke up n my sis was still @ the com.. idiot. still not done yet with her work.. it was 2 am! anw, the first thign i did was call out her name. she thought i was talking in my dreams. so she ignored me for a while. *grr* gee.. told her abt it. n she said maybe it was somekind of a message sent by my dad.. gila aja..

then i thought again, maybe he feels really bad, the crying was real though.. my brother can be a shocked-witness too there in my dream!! yea.. he feels bad, but he still had to go. why why why? *touch wood* if its brainwashed by someone; hell im gonna hunt that person down.

hai. cant help but cry at my stupid dream. i told my sis because i miss them. but its also.. bcs.. my dad cried whilst hugging me, maybe becuz i nv seen my dad cry before. also bcos i know he has certain hidden feelings that he cant say, troubled n all. most importantly i think i'd love the fact that we can live together again. 21-8 = 13. 13?? been away for the past 13 years. omg, its that long, hey?

wish when i wake up one day, mom n dad are too.. preparing for work, while sis, bro n myself prepares for work/ uni/ school. All of us living together. i miss those days.. if it had been that way all these while, none of thse problems would have arised between dad n mom.. nor us n them.. we've been out too long! but im thankful of course, dont get me wrong... i guess i just miss them..

fu: thanks for all the help earlier. it was so nice of you. very much appreciated =D n.. yea.. i wish i can sneak out n tip toe all the way back too.. miss the scoldings haha.. except that i dont need to, they aren't here.. =D

2006-08-08T01:18:00.000+10:00

I've been waiting...

Felt like I've never waited this long before... y cant i have it when i needed you most? just @ the time i thought i could have a shoulder to cry on? i need to talk to you. . but i dont know how to.

The feeling's like how you never find the stuff u are looking for, but its always there when u are not. That. and by the end of the day, when you found it; u dont know what to do with it suddenly. . .

@ 21, I still am stubborn as ever. No im not innocent. I just chose not too accept some facts. I hate to learn i have to accept them. good news is, im trying. .

its not easy, i was scarred.

once, twice, three times... the optimist voice in me says: great. for all different types of flaws, nothing is gonna happen for a 2nd time.

the down-to-earth says: you are so doomed - forever paranoid.

wth.

I love you. but im scared.

2006-08-07T10:33:00.000+10:00

I woke up this morning and i realized

I may forgive, but i cant forget.

Its never gonna be the same again.

2006-07-31T23:18:00.000+10:00

Had a haircut last saturday - it was the shortest haircut ive ever had in a long time - perhaps.. back in sec sch? nah, think it was pri sch. haa.. but it was alright i guess. new semester, new life, new beginning. =D

well things have gone pretty much the same.. since holidays.. - the sleeping late, the hoggings on Friends-shows, the weekend gatherings.. Told myself i will be, MUST be more determined to study even harder this semester! but its not happening yet. i think i have so much to revise n everything, researches, projects.. but i have no motivation =(

Today i give myself a break though. well because, i made a decision. hard one. have this connection in me, that little voice in me telling me perhaps i know what i'd like to do for this elective -- managing projects n events! partly cs dah is taking it, but i must admit i understood this better than when i was at Ogranisational Behavior lecture last fridaY! well.. i hope this would be a good subject to do.. *crosses fingers*

thing is, i went up to Said, prepared myself he's probably gonna have a lil 'war' with me in his office, however, he happily approved me! n gosh ive never felt so relieved - as in, yes. he was mean! he went all the way to make me feel so low n useless n guilty n all.. n i swore i couldnt even sleep in peace knowing i have this guilt consience.

i remember throwing tantrum in front of my bestie lala cos aug was mean. i hate to be treated in a harsh way when im down and stressed out - n by 'harsh' i mean uncomforting and impatient and loud and the look in the face with one eye bigger than the other, so when the eyebrows rise higher than the other, and that when forehead shows wrinkles. *hmpf*

i want a soft and calming advise... i want a soft pat up my head not a guy-2-guy nudge on the arm? yes i agree i was overreacting with Said's rude n un-senior advise/ words n i-duno-what-black records he was giving me? haih.. n the last day of the tute's enrolment n stuff? it was killing me! ='(

but luckily it all turned out well after dinner =D dinner was great @ Than Than! n was specially recommended by lala, though nothing on the menu she recommended was ordered =p
well after dinner, we went to Melb central's La Favorite cafe which have already closed for the day, sit @ one of those tables n talk it through. practically talked fer 4 hours straight, going over our problems and everything else..it was a good talk, though i cant help but notice ther's this mice *really small n grey n it looked like a cute hamster somehow*, keep popping out @ the corner of the pillar like every 10 minutes, cos my squeals apparently shoosh it off, otherwise it would have made it over to the other pillar. . . . n there was this indian couple making out like 4 tables right in front of mine. where the clock hand points @ 12. it was so disturbing. cmon lah. indians making out in public? i thought only the locals. n it was disturbing. i think they smooched for like 10 minutes. arent they tired? keep telling dah to move to the seat right opposite me but he wouldnt listen, he prefer to sit diagonally next to me. so hell i have to see that.

Then suddenly i saw head popping out of the corner of my right eye above the couch facing away from me. heads, with messy hair. n god. i noticed that like after 20 minutes we started sitting on that table. n it was ard 2 times i squealed when the rat showed up. *n that squealings didnt stop them * gawd! y cant they go to other places man. its a r e s t a u r a n t!

well aniway, we talked and we pointed out each other's mistakes n after sometime started to gossip a little about our dear friends out there.. gee hee hee..
owh.. right.. i havent yet written entries about my gold coast - sydney - brisbane trip... memorable. bonded with my friends, kinda well... but what in there, stays in there. i really wonder if our friendships will go on... n on... even though we all separate this end of the year.. i will miss those days yes..

really admired dah n kev n stan.. they're like the trios. best buddies, never separate since foundi.. once i talked to steph ( i think), w/o one of them, it aint complete. they do weird stuff together, they crap so much i cant remember any. lol. seriously? haa.. but i havent got those kinda girl friends u know.. i think guy friends are so much more friendlier in a way. they dont really judge you, or well.. maybe they do. but i wonder who are my real friends in here... the one i can really be with, forever, its not much like u know.. just uni friends, but more than that. i think lala's definitely one. have loads of friends everywhere. n hell i happen to confide in i dont know how many of them. but its too hard to maintain such close rlnships when u have other stuff you got to do? mainly with dah, uni, siblings and.. foundy friends.. yet again, its scattered already. but i wonder what its like, again, if im no longer in oz. did this marketing survey today @ food science project lecture (=p) n one question asked was

what was the hardest thing it's been for you whist studying oversease? n i wrote being apart from family n friends.

hell i hate it when i keep moving from one place to another. my life keep changing, my relationships distants for sure, regardless of what kind. gosh how thankful i am to whoever is the inventor of msn.

anyway, this just popped outa my head. there's another question was, if you could, what's the subject in the world you would like to do?
--> first thought, how to be a millionaire in one month.

ya i wish. we all wish. HAHA!

2006-06-26T01:10:00.000+10:00

been pretty hectic this week... loadsa shopping to do. never been so.... happily tired =p =p =p. ITS worth the energy n blisters on my feet =(. Huahuahua... Oh well.. there was Gina's present-huntin. then there was Annie's, Grandma's and Mom and Dad's souvenir n upcoming Susan's and Stella's... *gosh*

Of course, despite all that, i have had abit of 'this' fer myself. i admit, i cant resist the fact that THOSE stores are putting up BIG Red n White "SALE" n "STOCKTAKE SALE" n "MORE SALE" - - - they are literally luring me. NOt my fault. hehehe.

Oh Oh Oh i almost forgot, i bought this really cute toy called.... erh.. havent named it but at the moment i shall call it Mr. Tickly. At the slightest nudge, or even a clap near it, it goes... "Ahaha ahahaha wuhuhu whuhuhuhu ahahahha" Ok i sound crazy but im serious. its all vibrant and so tickly once u have it in ur arms... its a good toy to scare as well as cheer people up whenever they are sad, or when u are seriously bored u have nothing better to do. heee hee heeee

Saturday, 24th June

Have had our monthly "celebration" last saturday. Had pretty good dinner, at Kampai - Yumm. Soon after, we watched Click - superb movie, n Dah surprised me with Honeycomb Cheesecake. That's really sweet... When i meant, girls love surprises, its true. And it meant alot. Thank you dah.

And i really loved the fact that YOU dressed up for me. =)

See, so handsome!! so please get lost of those Gio tee Ok? Haha!

Sunday, 24th June

This morning i had one of those shack days again. went out with sis n brother to the market to get weekly groceries - kinda fun, 3 of us hangin out together... its so funny because by the time we get to the stalls, it was about 12pm, and sellers started yelling n stuff, "Half price off EVERYTHING" n "$3 off per Kilo!" n all. -- had to look at where i was walking to avoid my eardrums frm burstin frm all the shoutings there. Oh there was one funny stall thou, think he's probably Italian; guess what, he placed one sign that says

-- "We dont yell to sell" --

Cool hUh.

the three of us were admirin it, chuckle a lil but well, didnt bother much after, turned away and headed towards the ones on "SALE" hee hee

Had lunch at this Thai restaurant, then came back home to bathe n all before Me n sis headed out again in search of Boots, but only ended up with sis buying another jacket that was on sale. Really hope to get one of those knee length boots. mine's too short and high-heeled. hmpf.

Sadly, im out of my budget fer this month. sobs. too much shopping already. thought i had plenty of $$$ cos of exam period.. guess i was wrong... *guilty* well... applyin fer work right now.. hopefully i can get a job at MCG. Then i shall not worry about spending those unnecessary money. . . feel really bad cos my brother works; n he uses his hard-earned cash out to get his 'wants' yet... me being the big sister... dont. so embarassin yea.. sobs. n im gg to sydney, goldcoast and brisbane in a week's time. . . i'd better hold on to my wallet. but seriously, those BIG SALE banners are such..... POISON! ! evil things! argh! i hate stayin in the city now.

ps: read this article on this forum that says:

Guys will spend $2 fer $1 stuff that he needs; ladies will spend $1 stuff that's on sale but nothing close to her needs.

That's so true. - no comment -

Someone back me up! *haa*

erh.. well.. then we went out fer dinner... 3 of us, with my bro's friends, Vicki, Gavin, Bayoe and Ferry. initially headed fer Glenferrie - Seth Thai, bro was tellin me how spicy the food was, so spicy he will only order "mild". He's such a Chilli-freak; God knows how much chilli he adds to ALL his food. N he's only takin Mild. He says the "extra hot" 's ... inexplicable. woohoo...

Sadly, they're havin some kinda renovation. so we aimed at this 2nd nicest restaurant there, Samurai, which is located at the other end of the street. Guess what,

Mon- Sat: 10am - 1030pm
Sunday : CLOSED

so, we left fer Boxhill instead, about 7 train stations further. waited fer 17 minutes before the train arrives. plus was REALLY cold out there...

what a night... but its all worth it! 'am glad i had a whole day out with mi siblings. =D

i love holidays! ! ! !

me n sis - n that expression-z probably cos she's all hungry + cold + tired =_=''

2006-06-21T02:12:00.000+10:00

Hehe hehe..

Its been a really tough week I'd say, heaps of interesting happy moments, some unforeseen incidents and unpleasant and revolting yet explicit truths and various kinds of irresistable stress-build ups have had occured. Its crazy! seriously.

However, the gist of it would come down to - -> the fact that I'm finally all done with, the Exams! ! purfectly noted, with no regrets at all ! ! ! ! *crosses fingers*

yeh.. its only like one month ago, somewhat right after the end of semester, (during swot vac), miin started callin me out to library/ have study sessions together. told her no, explainin' how i really wanted to have a good rest after all those countless amount of assignments and reports. Basically either implicating im too lazy to start studyin or that im naively confident enough cos i have had quite a "revision" with those stupid assignments!

Sad to say, that didnt last long. yeh. . to sum up, 2006's 1st semester's like.. "wOw" - yea, best i can describe that as.

so here's a summary:

15th June, Thursday

Stanley threw his 24th birthday dinner party at Crystal Jade. Hehehe we made him wear this kiddy birthday hat - in pink! it was so funny. He's such a nice guy. i mean it (truly) - from the serious things he says sometimes of course. we aren't that close thou but he's dah's best friend here so i think thats why our friendship strengthened - in a way. What actually hit me was, without him, Aug wont be as hilarious. He always gets excited around him hey? Haha. Well, to think of it, kev plays a major role too. haha. these 3 guys, boy, since Trinity days, have made such an impact till now... they are still as crazy as ever... will miss them lots if they leave this year... *hmm*

have yes yes, loadsa fun as usual, plus the fact that i had finished my 3rd paper made it so much better! Furthermore, a secret plus point was that, i finally get to meet dah dah (*-^), eversince Sunday - when we went to fetch my sister frm the airport. well thing is, we dont meet that often, because he stay so far away and with this exam period, it just made it worse.

Anyways, we happen to end our exams at the same time that day and went to Indonesian Embassy together to collect this 14 boxes of Krispy Kreem we both preordered fer us and our friends. i know - so much! its fresh from Sydney, the best doughnuts ever. There was this charity collection goin on and the profits gained frm these doughnuts are donated to this olympic thingy and the disaster in Jogja..

well dah dah bought me, brother, kevin n himself each 1 box intially. The rest belonged to my friends. then later he got stanley and miin one each too. My dah is so generous! he got everyone one box and i totally appreciates that =) i mean. its really rare thing to do. although it wasnt much of a special thing fer me. since everyone else gets it. . . . =p

However, that day i picked up sth really, shockin. i didnt know how RUDe one can be. See, when u receive information in ur favor, what do you say? Thank You. When u receive gift from someone, what do you say? Thank You. When u get helped to do sth fer you, what do you say? THANK YOU. I jus cannot understand how can someone lack THAT much of basic courtesy? it just pisses me off. basic courtesyyyyy.. cmonnnnn...

16th June, Friday

Oh. i went to the library to start studyin fer my final paper on Monday. Basically vegging in there, listening to sister's Sony MP3 whilst studyin, bet nothing actually gets in, gee hee.. basically no mood to study fer the last paper. its just.. sigh. i duno what to say, u know, i felt so much like giving it up already. This last paper was so difficult. its Food Law and it requires so much udnerstanding n all. sobs..

went to cel later in the night, hang around with a couple of indo-christian friends; had a discussion on - The Bible. Did a little drama - on Zacheus.. lol.. Truly had enlightened me with loadsa stuff, really appreciated that. However, due to the doubtful un-Christianish questions i asked, i kinda felt that the group must have seen me like a weirdo or sth. felt odd fer a while = ... well i was curious mah.. =p anw, Winda cooked this perfect baked pork chop fer dinner! it was so delicious hehe.. n she still humbly say she sux at cooking ? aiyoh..

17th n 18th June

Alright, these 2 days i practically spent rily rily short time studyin. i stayed at home on both days, though tempted to go out with sis n bro shoppin at Bridge Road that Sunday! Haa... well i wanted so much to go out with sis.. didnt have much time to since she arrived.. cos i cant just relax when i have "things" in mind..

During the nights, sis n I chatted like... fer hours n hours and it was so much fun! showed me a couple of this jokes she get frm dun0-what-forum, gossips abt her friends n perhaps our relatives... yeah the list goes on... *=p

however, i also found some hurtin truths as well. its that, i realized someone's been really two-faced towards me. saying one thing and telling others another. i mean, its sounds primary school kids moans here; pretty childish when i say this, but it seriously hurts. i just cant stand liars. SLY ones. i hope they know what they are doing and i hope they get a good ol' retribution in return.

19th June, Monday (Exam: 2pm)

9am- 1130pm = last hours of flippin pages n busy memorizing...

1130pm= *yawns* got up to make coffee when i felt nausea and felt like fainting anytime

1135= panicked, sms-ed sis, mom and dah to ask - take coffee/ panadol? cant take both, i'll die! panick panick panick.

Panadol means- headache will be fine, but sleepy! sleepy means cannot do exam! Coffee means- i duno, awaken? but still prone to faint anytime? GOSH.

1140= sis smsed- panadol; Mom called - scolded me fer... ( i duno why she scold me!?!) n then said "DOnt study already lah, its ur last paper anw, u can do it! Just go to sleep and wake up the next 2 hour fer the exam,"; Dad (obviously they're in the car), said in the background, "Must be yesterday's Brazil against Australia's match, she didnt sleep!"

1150= staggered to the kitchen, grabbed some medicines, Panadol, Sangobion and eat them. oh right, and i hvent had breakfast, so i heat up sausage roll - stupidly, after i ate the medicines.

1200pm- 1pm = pee, poo, bath

1pm-115pm= decide what to wear

130pm = leave houz.

145pm = alighed in LaTrobe street, to catch City Circle to REB. whilst waitin fer the stupid 10min/time tram, i realized i didnt check my seat number beforehand! omg. panick, panick, panick. called dah, he's drivin, on his way out. Sis- sch, Bro- work. OMG! called Gina, she's there, and told me she'll check on the board n call me back. *phew*

153pm = city cirle arrived. travelling damn slow. panicked. Looked at phone several times, no news frm Gina. Called Stella, Susan, Jane - no answer. all in hall already !

2pm = reached the tram stop in REB. panicked, panicked, brisk walked up REB. still no call frm GIna. did she forget or what? anyway, ran up to one of those tanks, dump my bag n ran up the boards to see my number, n realized, i DIDNT know if its NICHOLSON or RATHDOWNE! shit. i looked at the board on one end, nope, ran to the other far end, n i realized how stupid i was. fer both nich/rath, u have them both on the same board, just that one's green and one's white; so i ran around fer nth. Ok, got it. 108.

215-415 = smile, frown, frown, smile n more smilez ! ! !

420 = felt like in heaven ! hahuahuahuhauahuhauahuha

2006-06-14T02:30:00.000+10:00

Loving the right person at the wrong time, Having the wrong person when the time is right, And finding out you love someone right after That person walks out of your life.

And sometimes, you think you're already over a person, Until you see them smile at you again,You'll suddenly realize that you're really not.
For some, they think that letting go is one way Of expressing how much you love the person, By sacrificing your happiness for theirs, Without realizing that the other person's Doing the same thing for them.

Most relationships tend to fail Not because of the absence of love; Love is always present, It's just that one is being loved too much And the other was being loved too little.

- creatively inspirational, dont you think?-
copyright frm -Sista- frm Soompi????? u think?

2006-06-10T00:48:00.001+10:00

Finally marketing is oVer!!!!

So happy! 2 down, 2 more to go!! It was really amazing, me n dah did a pretty good job i guess, i hope the two of us can get really good marks! We collaborated ideas together and amazingly we kinda guessed the questions right fer Section B's case study and it was all explicit and smooth... woohooo *Cheers*

Luckily fer me, whilst panicking last night at bout 1am, i did a map of consumer behaviour+promotion mix+PLC, which amazingly turn out to be the exact answer fer Section A's qn.

However, it was crazy. Section A (1Qn) was 40% and Section B (1Qn) was 60%. n there's only 2 hours to complete. My hands wrote from neat t0 acceptable then to what seem like doctor's handwriting - coils alike. I was practically out of time by the time i came to SEction B! probably had too much crap to write fer Section A! hmpf.

I thought i'll definitely flung this because i had poor time management and by 1/2 hour to the end of the exam, i was still explaining the first problem of Section B. how sad. i wanted to cry but i tell myself just speed this through and thank God, i managed to do it, although i kinda put it in point form fer the last few 'segments'; funny thing was, the table i had wasnt proportionately levelled, so it shaked pretty easily and whilst rushing through my exam, the table shOke fer few seconds before i used another hand to apply pressure to the end of the table to keep it still. Can u imagine how hard that was? It was like 4 degree in there and alhtough my palms are really cold, i can feel myself sweating in fear+ nervousness+ worry+excitement all at once. (excited because 1/2 hr later i will be done =p)

Its amazing how good I feel right now; been really really tired out fer the last 2 weeks...
Tme to have a good sleep tonight..

Fer a second... i think i might not though... unless.. miracles happen...

SINCERELY hope the weirdos dont work tomorrow since its a Saturday. They make hell loadsa noise in the morning!

--> The vans forever-reversing "beep beep beep beeeeeeeeeeep" noise;
--> the Soldering [Drrrrrrrrrrr]
--> the planking/ hammering/ {seriously dont know how to describe those noise its too complicated all at once} lol.
--> and the early birds -- know you guys wanna have breakfast, at the inexplicably amazing cluster of food cafes JUST below my apartment, but please do not shout/ scream/ shriek/ yell!
--> And i wish i can tell whoever rings the weird "school bells" to sTOP doing so!! so annoying! it always happen at 9am in the morning and there's not even any "schools" nearby!

not funny, they are so annoying.

ON a brighter note, again, i had a sumptuos meal at Pacific House, AND a nice dessert of Mixed Berry Cheesecake, from one of the exquisite cafes downstairs. - it tasted heavenly! THis is the BEST cheesecake i have ever ever ever tasted. The mixture of the cheese was so tender, the sweetness level was purfect, the underlayered cookie dough -- the best part of all and my favourite of course, was *wahhhhhhh* yummy!
- so much better then the ones i made.. =

Anyways, thats it fer tonight...

*yawn* n good night!

2006-06-08T23:44:00.000+10:00

- Feeling sad -

Its weird. I was happy during the day. Really.

Why cant happiness last?

2006-06-07T02:22:00.000+10:00

Cant believe i sat here 'studying' fer about .. 15 hours today! - well.. minus some little hours of course ---> i had about 1/2 break watching Jennifer Aniston on Rove live earlier tonight.. and...
1/2 hour singing songs like I Say a little Prayer OUT loud. (haha! - no 1's ard n im stressed - so who cares . =p)
then.. of course minus about 1 hour on bathing n chatting on the phone and msn;
then about 1 hr break on meals ( brunch + dinner ) which i had on my study table aniwaes.. although i ate staring at the paper but nothing was absorbed really.. Huahua.. culd have had a proper meal at the table but usually if brother is not ard i wont do that..

to think abt it.. if im alone at home (which i usually am); i will eat on the sofa or at my study table.. kinda pathetic.. my HUGE dining table is only used when guests are ard.. usually loads of them, like that during the steamboat party...and the housewarming.. otherwise its used when stella or dah dah or brother.. or... yah.. or them. when they come/ are ard.

well tomorrow's paper is this really lengthy subject that requires precise explanations; ie. definitions + types of organims + examples et cetera.. im so tired about 1 hr ago.. n i drank coffee.! i could have resisted that. but i cant! i cant sleep having the thought that i can only memorize the 20 Food Additives n 16 Processing Aids n their functions n examples tomorrow morning?!! - sounds pretty easy, but its so terribly n confusingly hard n complicated to digest... sigh

so here i am... busy memorizing.. but well i kinda did a gd revision i must say -- food additives apart.

thanks to the ~12 hour last minute mugging! Huahua.. n im feeling kinda gay right now. there are certain inquires about some of the topics which have been unexpectedly solved easily and quickly! (thanks to my wonderful lecturer.. haa.. Stirk Kyle- he is so nice hey? - never hav that before since 1st year.. )

then again.. there is this surprising thing that happened today too. my brother had his exams this afternoon and he told me (since yesterday) that Myers is having sale today! up to 50% and he probably is gg there after the exams. Think he hinted me to go too cs the last time we went togehter we bought quite alot of stuff n it was quite fun. but i have to prepare for exams tml n when he knew abt it he didnt bother to ask anyway. well then again, he came back with a bag.. n shoved it to me, n asked if its nce.

its this box of chocolate, frm... erm.. Nina's, quite nicely packaged and the first thing i asked was, "so u bought this?" kinda expected my now-vain brother to get himself jacket or sth.. haa.. but anw he explained that its $17 before n its got 30% off so yea.. but there's only 8 of them n its not like Max Brener or Coco Black leh... so kinda bo hua (=p)

well.. then he left to his gf's hoz to hav dinner n then when he returned he asked if i had ate it.. but i didnt eat it at all.. cos ... well didnt feel like at the moment. but anw, he ate one and then he put it on my bookshelf and said.. mm can give Putri later when she comes, then he went out..

i was busy reading my notes so i didnt pay attention to that.. but after he left 10 mins later.. i thought, hey, was that for me? if not why didnt he take it to his room? he always do.. wahhaa..maybe it was, but he thought i didnt appreciate that? i mean.. my sis is coming only this weekend mah.. haha.. but anway. i felt really happy! just glad =D *thanks An.., if my assumptions is right (unless the choc was bad n he didnt like it) * hee - well he culd have given that nicely wrapped box to his gf too..

hrm... surprisingly today i had quite a good day. Despite all the rush and stress im feeling for tml's exam... And.. actually.. I cant wait to meet dah dah tml after exam to have dinner at Laksa King! *yummm* then he also says he's coming to my home to discuss Marketing with me! yay!! -- so ordinary but im just all excited so its kinda givin me motivation to study!

On the other hand, I also have tinge of excitement regarding my Sis coming this weekend! i Cant wAIt!! although i might be ignoring her until the 19th June... but i guess i will spend some time takng her ard the city n take her to those korean restaurants, meet my friends... andmost importantly, I can do loadsa stuff with her!! n she cooks really well too!! hauhauuauhaua.. missed those days when we chat all night.. i guess she must be all excited n happy that she's gonna be here. =D with me n brother.

but im afraid she will get homesick n cries... if she does, i will too..

2006-06-03T02:50:00.000+10:00

have had weird habit of eating one panadol each day these days; without it my headache throbs so bad it felt like its gonna explode anytime =(

tried to stop it as what dah dah told me to.. but i cant.. apparently by 10pm i had to eat 2 tablets before it gets better.. of course since i hadnt had dinner i cooked instant beehoon which tasted like heaven.. and yeah.. i kinda got better after that.. Haha..

well im trying to settle down n concentrate on my studying but somehow i felt relaxed; its either the fact that i had too much problems up in my head (due to the mean + 'bas..kets' ), that i cannot focus on my work because there's jsut too many things for me to do/ think! or that i'm confident that i can do this, which... i doubt.. or that.. somehow i had the strength to believe in myself and i think that is probably why. Ok kinda not make sense to a third party here.. but it definitely matters to me.

umm at the moment..i just wanna vent my frustration here...

Home@Flinders suX! i hate them so much!! all i have up in my mind at the moment is how should i deal with them on Monday. i felt that i can break down n cry on n on n on n on.. they are such bullies! This is so ridiculous.. lousy rate, lousy connection, lousy service, lousy CUstoMER service. Firstly, its 256K fer $100/ mth! it says unlimited but its soooo slow i think with this rate i predict im only spending like 500 MB max! totally absurd and they say this is the best rate in town? call me troublemaker and biggest complainer? HUH! FYI, i can get better rates from tpg internet provider for speed of 24K, max download 18 GB for just $50! * i have proof alright *

And this latest totally obnoxious news i received was that they KNOW WHAT sites we surfed and check on us all the time (NO PRIvACY? Ok, nvm) ! u might be able to "HACK" my service at the moment so i reckon u guys are probably LOOking at this as well huh?

Anyway, U say bit torrent is illegal and they say 6 ppl in the whole building is using it and that it takes up 90% of the band width. HEY so the whole building is AFFEcTED by this and just 6 comps can bring this rate down so slow, even slower than that of a dial up speed? DO u guys know that it takes me 20 minutes to load a "UNIVERSITY WEBSITE?" yeah. thats just with 6 comps. n this can bring down to such a disaster. cmoN, we pay a hundred bucks each month and we are first restricted to what websites we want to surf? (the paper mentioned its only for "work") And secondly we are running at what seemed like worse than dial up speed? Why dont u guys let us USE OTHER proVIDERS out there?? whY does it have to be restricted to YOUR servicE? i tried to talk this out nicely, hoping to request for another offer or alternatives because i do "reasonings" and "research" alright? I have my rights and I AM obtaining it no matter what. BUt u NOt only disregard our complaints, you INSULted ME!

I know i'm small and Im a girl, but I have BRAINS alright. NOne OF US ARE HAPPY with the service. they just took it because they are given no choice. i wanted to do the same too. but the slowness just gets on my nerves, because it wasnt only unworthy of my money, its very disturbing because i cannot do my work at all. i just cant help it. n I didnt brainwash them into coming with me! we met in the lift and along the corridors and they are all cowards who refused to speak a word so I was there to start it off and you thought i was the gang LeaDER? cMON, grow up!!

Hey im staying in a high rise buidling alright. in the city! and NONE of the apartments are working the way you guys are. EVen the STUDENT APARTMENTS DONT! why cant we get our rights as a customer at all? what service is thIS?

Alright, enough of that. too bad i have 1 year contract so i have to bear with this for another 8 mths. shOUld i reach my limit and highest dissatisfaction level, like what ACCC (Consumer SErvice in Aussie) advices, im jsut gonna complain to the Tribunal and do some real reasonings at the court. I mean it. Im So sicK Of it.

sick!

2006-06-02T11:42:00.000+10:00

i had a dream last night

Its the day I received my results
H1, H2B, H3, H3...

*noooo!!*

they say.. if u tell.. it wont come true...

so it wont right? hehe...

2006-06-01T02:36:00.000+10:00

oh loves in the air
its everywhere
everyone can see
everyone can feel
that love.. is in the air
it doesnt matter where
everyone agrees love is all we need..

when the moonlight falls in your eyes,
i know the sun has set..

the fire still burns within me
since the day we met

la la la la la la..

2006-05-30T21:21:00.000+10:00

its finally swot vac. uni has ended. but it doesnt make any difference really; i meant the "excitement" and "happy holidays" mood any students would have felt. But it gets worse, the pressure is back, mood tightened, notes piling up, time passes even faster; suddenly its dark. n i dont think i did anything fruitful today. then.. sleeping times seem to shorten drastically, umm appetite increased (haha), even what i once thought was impossible actually happened! ---> dah dah stopped playing W0W (wakaka)!

this semester had passed so quickly i can even remember what i did in my first tutorials... sigh.. WHY? haha.. showed how much my life has been so stagnant, not much vivacity at all. just study n assignments n reports... although there was the fishing and the movies and karaoke sessions n tennis.. n... nothin much really.

im actually moving quite well at marketing, maybe because its easy to understand... anwae, was bored.. and started to scroll down my msn list, and i cant help but notice something really annoying. yes, i understand its exam period, but why 'DND PLZ' + cum 4 x "!" somemore. aiyoh. just go n off ur msn lha. how weird hey? what do they expect really. i mean. ur definitely number 1, pissed when someone initiate 'chats'; number 2, busy; number 3, so fierce no one would wanna talk to u anyway.

ok. to think about it, i might be weird myself, why would i notice such things right? haha. im quite weird la..(happy august?) i cannot stand the fact that i have other stuff in mind that ought to be done yet undone.

*hmm* anyway, this, especially dedicated to you: thank you.. fer yesterday's; its a total satisfaction. i had KFC, in like what seemed like years! hueuehuehue... most imptly ure willing to come down to send me home in TRam, and just to have lunch with me.. i cant express how glad i was cos of how much u've changed ( u probably wont last time) ... n today at 1.20pm, u called wondering if i have reached indo embassy, its really sweet. . i duno why.. this time its not about 'finding out' where i was, but its the concern i gained... although there was not big a deal.. but i must admit it made me happy! <-- im really easy to please huh.

Anyway, better get back to studying. ive taken too long a "break" huehuehue

oh. just to make a note, i'd like to express my deepest condolesence to the people in jogja.. read a paper frm Kompas, these people have certainly the worst ever nightmare they can ever have; they are so pitiful! there's this pregnant lady who had to sleep standing whislt holding the baby in her arms, because the ground (notice its not even a floor), was too wet to sleep on! how sad.. the rain washed everything away. not even food nor basic necessities are available..

its inexplicable how much thy are suffering; what they're asking for right now, is really simple. it doenst even have to be monetary items. One victim said, "nasi bungkus saja" ie "just rice box" .. so sad.. i hope the world have heart and eyes.. and help these ppl.. European Union, World Health Organization etc..

*sigh*

told my dad to migrate to sg/ oz... its very dangerous out there.. n he said as long as he prays and do good things consistently, it will be Okay. then i asked, "dont the people in Jogya do good things then? if so, why would this happen to them?" then he said.. it all comes back to karma n reincarnation....*gawd*

seriously, if i had the time n chance, i would ask him more. but my brother had to take my laptop off to sch and so im forced to end the conversation. I mean, im totally confused, doesnt it ever occur that its dangerous dad? First it was tsunami, now this.. i know Jakarta is in safe "plate" but what if... *choy choy* im just worried.... ={

In this world you may have trouble, but dont worry, cos it will make it d0uble =D

2006-05-23T17:18:00.000+10:00

Ku sempat ucapkan pisah
Saat kau beranjak pergi
Tapi perasaanmu
Tak berpaling dariku
Ku ucapkan jangan pergi
Saat kau datang kembali
Tapi luka itu
Tlah membeku tak mencair

Taukah kamu
Semenang pagi
Aku menangis
Mengingatmu mengenangmu
Mungkin kah itu terungkap dalam
Apa selalu
Terungkitkan kenangan kita

Ku telah hadirkan dia
Untuk mengantikann kamu
Tanpa ku sadari
kau takan pernah terganti
Ku ingin tinggalkan dia
Dan menyanjinmu kembali
Ini tak’an adil
Untukmu ataupun dirinya

AUDY - [Menangis Semalam]

2006-05-19T04:38:00.000+10:00

I accidentally snapped at you..

Im sorry, I am in a bad mood...

Right now whenever i need someone to talk to... i guess i have to think twice...

Conversations seem meaningless too..you think?

2006-05-19T01:52:00.000+10:00

Today i feel so bete. Heaps of unforeseen bad stuff (s) had happened to me.

1st. Got my rejection letter from Bio21. Its really upsetting because i kinda got naive enough to give myself false hope on successfully approved. Now its none, and although on a positive note, i will be having no limited period to go on a holiday, i still feel that i wont be happy... i longed to go to GC, with someone... yet i think it wont happen... the place i wanna go.. the things i wanna see.. i'll just have to prepare for that.. and money for later... but i doubt.. so many things to pay for at e momnt...

2nd. my brother was caught by tram inspector, cos his tram ticket was with me. sigh. so thats $150 fr that.

3rd. whilst having breakfast, i accidentally poured milk to the carpet.. and over my pants.

4th. tried to get it off, using carpet cleaner powder... and then whilst vacuuming if off, i broke the vacuum handle.

5th. went to school for 3 hr lecture straight, happily handing up one of my many many assignments, but realized later that i missed a point. which was relavant. so i had to kinda alter it again. *nth bad - but i jsut dun like the feeling - its meant to be done!*

6th. lala n i went to jaycar and we saw ths really cute machine that roughtly says "touch me/ try me/ shocking" - if im not mistaken. so we had our palms over the handles on it... turned it on.. nothing happened. so i removed mine away, and told her it'llprobably electrocute us or sth. she told me to put my hands back and as i did it.. i realized 1/2 seconds later i was right. so... i screamed really loud... and practically threew my handphone down on the ground (luckily it was carpeteD) and she burst into laughter. *grrr* ... what horrible toy!! who the hell invented it hey? how can they sell this anway.. "but honestly i thought of buying it, so i can punish the ppl who are naughty" *hehehe* well anwiay, luckily there was loud music blasting away in the store.. so no one, i think, saw me freaked out...

7th. my internet practically lagged..... moving at the rate like snail moving with its shell upside down.... (can it?) sigh.. im rushing my 7 reports loh.. and so far.. i managed to complete 1!! and i need to do researches.. lOADs of them in order to complete these!!

8th. i had to do preparation for marketing tute tml.. and the case study for his week is on web... OF ALL WEEKS, it had to put it on the web this time. usually they have it on the txbk, n when i GOT my txbk with me this time, the case study is not from there! so frustrating!! and i had to wat for 1.5 hour for the pdf file to load for me to read it...

i guess its meant to be...
today lady luck certainly hates me...
anyway, i really am annoyed with this service at my apt. so lousy! im now almost 4 mths in my rent and i see no improvements at all. no tel service till now!! oMG!!! i cant wait tll the day i get my super fast unlimited internet! n by then i would have finished all my assgm.. wth.. seriously i dont know why i am in this state at the moment. really regretted not getting whiteman street...

Again.. i always regretted the things i do.. the things i say.. the decisions i make.. the reasons i give.. the excuses i made... that is why i am what i am where i am who i am today...
Life seems so meaningless these days....

2006-05-06T01:05:00.000+10:00

In conjuction to our weekly assignments to this particular subject; Tech of Food processing, we had our so far-the-fourth factory visits; this time to CUB. Carlton- sth- Brewery... house. It was really dreadful at first, I was scheduled the morning group, so had to get up really early at 7.. (considering i slept at 4am the night before).. so yah.. cold and all sleepy.. me n the girls took the tram down and amazingly, we were 1/2 hour early! (which is really funny, cos we are the late-coming-students; not jane though)

the BRew house was sooo cool! This is the cleanest and exclusive factory ive ever seen. Furthermore its located in Zone 1! most factories are like Zone 3... never fails to bore me even before i get there. so i was all excited n happy! especially when we were told that we were gonna get beer tasting at the end of the whole "tour". yes, "tour". sadly, we have to do assgn on that. report on the beer processing analysis. but its all good i guess. cos it was so interesting and the multi-tasked tour leader kept repeating herself so much i kinda have done the report there and then up in my mind; somehow. - her name's Ros. haha. "Ross" *giggles*

basically, one of the major components in beer-making is live yeast (sth u avoid if u find that in ur food) and hops (the grossest bitterest ugly smelly PLANT that's grown on earth). The pilot lab leader (apparently my 1st year student mentor) actually gave out these hops for us to smell. the moment my nose was like 10cm away from the jars, i almost puked.

Loved the packaging line; they do fillings of beer bottles at like millions/ hour which is so amazing. At least i think it is. so these guys lined up like "little soldiers" like what stella desribed and uh.. so cute! hauhuaha.

then the good part of all, i get to drink 4 diff samples of beer, 1 light, 1 medium and 2 full strength ones. though 4, i had like 5 or 6 samples, of few mouthful each *cheat* i mean, fresh from the tap duh... light was good- think its sterling, medium was better! then it comes to barking duck and this beer cum coke which taste so weird i smelt hops. then.. oh, i forgot what are the nx 2 samples i tried.

Overall, the trip was quite beneficial, though i still have hopes on choco factz ones.. hehe..

ok, that thing sticking out there is my last finger, freaky!

Ah.. oh well.. that trip ended only half a day, which is really GREAT! but only for a while, cos after i buy lunch with my girls, i had to go back home to do my marketing assignment. Another factory analysis. uhhhh... but the good thing is im able to meet up with dah dah. (cos im doing it with him) so u see.. silver lining. (^0^)

well.. because i promised to get lunch for him and it was 1pm by the time i'm done buyin lunch, i kinda rush myself cos i felt bad. it takes me about 1.5 hour to get to his hoz!

here's a funny thing: while waitin fr the tram, lala pressed the tram info button and it says 4 min to go. thinkin ther's probably time to draw some cash frm the ATM, 3 of us crossed the road to queue. Then suddenly Jane told us its ther. Quietly, lala turned around, and ran off. i ran after her. sadly, wrong direction. she ran towards the next tram stop, which is like 2 blocks away. so we had to "sprint" and smartly for jane, she turned the right direction, which is like 2 metres away to the tram stop. *lol*

However, all worn out and still panicky, i still put dah's interest at priority, thinkin how i can ensure he wont go starving waitin for me. hENce explains why i kinda moody at that time... when a little argument went on..

But it was all good, luckily, cos i had a Good loud laugh after watching Friends 4th episode of the 8th series. I totally recommend that. ^0^
However, we spent the whole day doing this, which i can happily say we're 80% done!

pretty much a fruitful day...

2006-04-30T23:39:00.000+10:00

Last Sunday was Fishin day. Went to St Kilda Pier for the first ever fishin trip in my life. Was kinda excited at first, cos we're rentin this yacht or rather.. boat.. and i assumed its a safe and fun trip.. so yeh.. oblivious to any possible consequences...

WEll yeh.. the sea was choppy.. got quite sick.. sea sick.. and it was FrEEZin out there in the middle of the ocean. 730 am and the sun was still not up!

Was alright at first because I was chattin with Naomi happily then it was until Yu Min got dizzy that Naomi got to attend to him which left me sittin there alone gazin out at the greenish cum greyish sea - for a moment i thought it looked like melon flavoured Nutri-Jelly.. hehehe..

oh well... so thats when "IT" started. tried to ignore the feelin by pickin up the reel and focusin hard on the instructions given by Andre (guy i/c) and yeh.. fish.

nothin. i thought. but actually its cos i duno whats happening. haha.. gareth was staring down the whole time while i was turning around tryin to ask what i was supposed to do with that stringy stuff, and was i supposed to turn clockwise or anticlockwise when i feel ther's a movement. so yeh. cant be bothered to ask from him. then i turned to dah dah who is also as blur as me. hauhau. aniwas it wasnt long before Andre came to my aid.

There was sth else that made me hesitant in asking around, all i do was look at them, hopin someone will do eye contacts with me, BECAUSE, i felt that if i open my mouth i will get sick any moment.

hehe. aniwae.. things got a little better when Kev managed to get the 1st FIsh! then I was motivated to get mine! so focus focus.. for about what seem like 10 tmes i thought i caught one, it was actually the pull by the hungry greedy fishes who snatched my bait so very fast; its like seconds to submerging it!

well.. Haha.. after what seem like hours, i finally got one! it was baby snapper! but cos its <25 cm we've got to free them.

Shortly, i felt sick.. again.. but well.. was great experience. One thing i learnt, im definitely prone to air/sea/ or so called long-rough- journey sickness. and i better buy some of the pills nx time.

OH OH OH

DAH DAH is mi big angel!! =) FOund my anklet!!!

Always manage to find the things i misplaced yea? hehehe.. THAnk you!!
apparently i was wrong, so it wasnt the tennis court. Hey, Maybe it was something the Senior angel scheduled for u to do, as in once in a while tasks u see.. heheheh - just like how u found my ring back then.. in the garbage chute.. ^0^

STill appreciate it as much, although it meant nothing animore.. =D

To sum up.. this week has been one of the better weeks ive had this semester... Least amount of work, Get to watch movie and Free Krisy Kreme (huauhaua everyone who came to lecture on Friday was given each a dozen of these delicious melt in the mouth doughnuts)!!

ThouGH>>>>> i got kinda lousy marks in Analytical Techniques midtest.. sigh.. but i cant be too bothered cos there are so mani stuff comin up nx week.. lotsa assgnments..

nevertheless, i will still dig some time out to laze around in my sofa to watch Friends. It never fails to cheer me up, regardless of what kind of sadness-disease i often catch these days..

2006-04-21T17:49:00.001+10:00

ok. i just realized i lost my anklet!! i think i lost it when we were playin tennis yesterday at Uni. Damn. sobs. It was a gift from my Grandma about 3 years ago and i have been using it ever since. never left my ankle that is. except for once when i almost lost it about 2 years ago.

Thing is, i lost it after playing tennis too! geez. what is it with that cmon.. to think about it.. i kinda mobilized my whole family members to look for it. my maids and even my dad who was late for his tennis session =p (see how impt that was to me?)

I was in indo back then.. came back from sports club just in front of my home and realized i wasnt wearing it. ok difference is that, i knew i took it off because i dont want it to get between my skin and shoes cos its gotta hurt. so yeh.. i examined the whole court, the route i walked along, hopin i will find it.. even asked my coach for it. n felt bad cos it must have seemed to him that i assumed he has that.

well i found it on one of the benches there instead. lucky for me.

BUt thiS TIME, its different. sigh, the wind was really strong yesterday and it was TOTALLy a bAD DAY to PLAy tennis! argh! well perhaps becoz i wasnt playin well. felt quite terrible.. =( i mean.. i could have played better, but everything was really bad.. could be the racquet, the balls, the wind.. n particularly, myself. i lost one of my new Szhallenger balls! sobsob.. n its of all balls..

Now im in pain. body achin all ova.. why on earth did we play at 12pm aniwae. its such a bad time.. even lost my favourite anklet. bad day for tennis.

- ill feel -

2006-04-21T14:41:00.000+10:00

so. i actually moved in to an apt with no phone line installed in the building. how stupid is that.till this day its almost 2 mths without this basic line of service.

honestly, im kinda used to that. though calls overseas to my parents cost $10 for 20 minutes, had to do assg/ reports out in uni and it IS just hard. its not flexible and tedius that is. BUt apparently had G coming to me sayin,"be patient! if u're gonna be affected frm every bad stuff that happens, then whats life man?"

thing is, no 1. imagine urself in my shoes. no 2. i paused thinking and realized this was the only issue i brought up which i thought was "frustrating".oh hold on, maybe a little whining on why the 1 week easter break ends so fast. i mean. thats perfectly normal right, considering im just a human.

anyway, as much as i think i am sane, i think she is right. perhaps she is the little angel that was there to give me a wake up call. self reflections, yes. i think i might do some. i talked too much of negative stuff, regardless of work, studies, trips, friends, weather, yeh.. see.. everything under the sky. *shakes head*

alright alright. i sHALL watch more friends and get to laugh more often or sth. its fascinatingly down to earth yet a perfect way of destressing!haha.. just kiddin.

to sum up, this week hav been really a great week. i think ive put on the weight i lost before and its the same old me again. haha. okay, it was quite flattering tho havin to be noticed n commented "thinner" heueuhue.. but okay, now that winter is coming, cant help it, the cold just increases my appetite. so be it. hahaha..

anyway, also becos, so many ppl have been visiting me! haha not "me" sorry, "MElbourne" i shud say.

1. my aunt n uncle n cc sherly. brought us to Old kingdom for their famous legendary roast duck. woohoo.. best duck in Melb.

2. bro's gf's mom kept cooking each night so for about 2 weeks i kinda have "Free catering" cos my brother always brings backfood home from theirs.

3. Isaac and Diana moved out. so somehow there was this dinner treat from Diana's mom at Limos (Western Dishes); though i wasnt surei was invited. in fact, no i wasnt. haha

4. Stanley and Kevin won some $$ frm gambling the other night and treated us dinner at Kum Den. so there u go. didnt wanna go cos felt bad they probably just wanted to treat Aug for being their faithful driver, and so dragged me along. but hey kevin got pissed off when i refused to so
yeh. ^0^ THIng iS...... I MET JOANNE along CHinatoWN!

Well Joanne told me she would be here someday between 19th-20th aPril, but i forgot when and lost touch since my lovely home has that lack of PHOne line service. ANwyay, it was really coincidence so yeh, i end up bringin Jo n Grace around the area and to my place then Crown, where they end up playin a little in the Casino. heheh. Too bad they didnt wanna join me n Kev n gang but i met up again with her yesterday and treated them to Pacific house, so that makes no 5. good food ive been to this week.

Anyway, that night we went to Casino after dessert in Greco and witnessed how Stan n Kev n Gareth gambled. HOrrible.hundreds of dollars shoved on the poker table.. sigh.. DAh dah was even saying, he wont ever gamble cos u see how u gamble awayur possible $$ to go on trips? i mean, they MIghT have won.. again.. but sigh.. $300 could buy me MAx n Co jacket?

hRm.. Back to Joanne, i was UTTERLY DUMBFOUNDED when i found out she played WOW! argH*! how could she!! tried to complain about how dah dah is SO into WOW he could probably get WOW as his longlife partner and she said, "HEY i plAY THAT TOO!" and turned to Dah dah:" SO u play mass raid?"i felt like i could faint any moment when i heard that.
So hey, what's that supposed to mean. is WOW THAT good!? maybe, but hey, im gonna stick to NO!

lol.. what a week.

2006-04-10T01:24:00.000+10:00

I had had one really great day yesterday overall. Finally felt out of the "cage" and for once in what seemed like ages, i finally get the chance to vacuum and tidy up my place. Its really great waking up in the late morning, cuddling in my quilt, feeling no burden, no worries to think about. And that I actually was looking forward to do house chores.... weird but true.. heheh.. well i first started vacuumin my room.. then the lounge room, then got quite tired so took a break.. watched "Secret Garden" while i ate some brunch..

It was really yummy.. FIsh dumpling and Belachan egg from the NIght Market the night before. Which by the way, was a GREAt night too! haha.. cant imagine i did that again! this year's was much better off than last years'. aNd.. i met ALOT of old time friends; SIdesh, Jeremy.. n those back in ZPS - QUeenby, THeresia; haha.. what a weird way of meeting up! Zhe an stood me up thou! he said he WUld COm! *grrr* Anyway, they Queenby n Therz r from MOnash, fancy meeting them in Mel U, of all places yea.. din even let them know i was opening Kampoeng Indo and yeh.. its just amazing how we met.. and i couldnt stop chatting with them until the customers queuing at the back were giving me the "look'
duh... =_=''

Of course i felt bad too on some occasions, cos Gareth n Steph n Kev and DAh dah came but i couldnt give any "treats" cos this isnt me in charge. so i felt really bad.. well i could ask... lala n qq but its just too unethical. But its really great to see them there...

it ended about 940 pm. did cleaning up. THats THE wORst part. had to go to the "hidden hUGE kiTchen" at union house to do the MANUAl cleaning. Damn. the auto wasnt working! hmpf. anyway, whilst washing up, there was another guy i met. Another weird place to know someone.

Overall, the night was really COLD yet comforting.. glad i took part.. even though i only did the banner and the selling.. hehee.. n guess what! lala actually paid me! wahh.. isnt that great! i thought i was only helping.. heheuhe..

well.. on that note, i really was impressed at how dah dah treated me that day.. was indeed a vast improvement hehee.. brought me a drink and satay and called me to check how i was.. wanted to send me home..really happy.. but i wonder.. is that bcos i saw Wendi? hehe.. oh well..

Anyway, back to where i was, last morning, yeh. i was sayin.. after the cleanup etc.. made my brother's room.. then did laundry n dryin.. well.. zong zi.. i felt such a satisfaction no one ever understand ever. then i started on the marinating for that night's suprise dinner for my cousin. cooked since 3-6! well.. it was worthwhile.. with bro's help, came up with 2 dishes of chix, teriyaki beef n lamb, chap chae, coconut rice, szechuan pork n tofu.. hmm...

but that night wasnt what i expected it to be.. its kinda less enthusiastic and quiet for 6 ppl.. dah was out of place i know.. sigh. but this IS going to be the way if he wanna be with me for the rest of my life. facing indo ppl all the time... ='( n i know he was kinda pissed he couldnt udnerstand what we were saying... if he continues to react that way.. what should i do? i mean.. this is reality. i reckon we will have some communication breakdown with my family nx tym.. not that they dont understand the language.. but.. this is the thing with Indos, when they are around their own ppl, (ie. Indos), they tend to speak in indo. u'll never find us talking with one another in other lang. there u go. unless u get ppl like me, or lala or annie, who doensnt mind. cos we speak eng to one another. and we're used to it. So yeh.. i just wish things were different.. or.. maybe not.. *shrugs*

But then again, we're lucky, saved out of this lil bit of fumez suddenly; Miin called to watch Ice Age 2.. wahaha.. so there u go. went out again at 830 to catch the hilarious, relaxin movie... well when we got home after that movie, we went on to watch LOST Episode 18!!! IT WAS soo exciting! but hey... its getting freakier each time.. and last night i kinda had a bad night sleep cos i was sleepin in a weird position i guess. lol. neck kinda ache even till now. hmpf.. but aniwae.. im lookin forward for nx wed, when episode 19 is out! hehe... dah said we are at the same phase with the State's!! coOL eh!! hehee..

ahhh. im sittin here at Stella's bro's com now.. bloggin.. n its now 2am.. wodner if she's done with the prac report.. came to sch this morning and did my final 4 reports due tomorrow. well.. before i reached sch.. kinda argued with Dah cos there was a traffic jam and was kinda pissin off cos had to hurry to get to WOW. Hate WOW man. hate it. it ruined everything i can think of; great weekend, attention.. *i just wish WOW NEVER eXIST!* HATE It!!! So much!!

hrm.. i guess it'll do fer nw.. To tsunting if u happen to read my blog, I finally updated it! aren't u glad? haha.

Miss u girl..bet u are having hell load of fun eh.. glad u are... =D

2006-04-06T18:08:00.000+10:00

It is too inexplicable to describe what I feel today… the feeling is so great I can just think of nothing but laugh or smile... heheh..

Guess what! Food Safety, Quality and Regulation ASSIGNMENT 1 iS DONE!! Hauhauhuauahuha.. its one of my biggest achievements I had ever this year, I must say. This is such a HARD. HARD. HARD essay to do. Been at this for like weeks and it did manage to stress me out so much…

Anyway, I’m just glad, this is over.

Right now im in ILFR lab. So called my 2nd home…. Yeh.. just finished my report n waiting for dah to finish his project to go dinner together.. oh well.. been here day n night for the past few days to do my assignments and stuff.. so tiring man.. well.. thatz bcos there is no INTERNET in mY HOME!!! PATHETIC right. *GRR** its been 1mth goodnesssake!!!! Hmpff

Anyway, Jst made 2 new friends; whilst waiting. They are really funny. 1st year students. A girl named Novi and a guy named Jessica. Oh 5 minutes later he changed it to Mary. Funny guy. Well… they were doing IT assg which I enjoyed n dreaded at the same time 2 years back. It was really strange. Looking at them.. remind me of how I was back then… gee.. well.. full of questions and all.. time really flies… *hmm*

Well its almost 9… n its so cold out there… n best thing is, Im all alone with this ang moh in the lab.. I hope he doenst go before I do, otherwise I will be all alone by myself. Again. Like yesterday.. hmpf.. although technically I wasn’t alone… there were like 7 of us, 3 couples n me. Yeh…

anyway gtg.. ahaha